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Woman Cancels $500 Flight After Being Made a Third Wheel on Her Own Trip

by Charles Butler
November 16, 2025
in Social Issues

There’s a special kind of excitement that comes with planning a trip to see a long-distance best friend. It’s all about counting down the days until you can catch up, laugh, and just be together. But for one 19-year-old, that excitement turned to pure fury.

After shelling out $500 she could barely afford, she discovered that her “best friend trip” was actually a romantic getaway for her friend and the friend’s boyfriend. She wasn’t just a guest; she was slated to be a prop, a third wheel left to navigate a new city all alone while they had their couple time.

Her response was swift, and it has the internet buzzing.

Let’s break down this travel plan from hell:

Woman Cancels $500 Flight After Being Made a Third Wheel on Her Own Trip
Not the actual photo

AITA for canceling my plane ticket?

I (19F) have a best friend (20F) who lives in another state. She has a boyfriend (21M) who goes to school with us,

but my bestfriend decided to go home for the summer so its just us. Her birthday is coming up and her boyfriend suggested that

we fly out to go see her, which I was excited to do.  We started making plans and it came time to book the tickets.

None of us are rich but they absolutely have more money than me, and it stressed me terribly to spend $500 on a ticket anywhere.

I still bought it, because she is my friend and she means a lot to me. The two of them had been planning the trip without me

and I was excited to see what they'd planned. Once we all got on Facetime, I realized they planned one on one time every single day

and I would be left in the city with no friends for hours on end. She didn't plan anything fun for just the two of us to do together.

And on the first night, they plan to go on a walk together and leave me in the house with her parents and siblings (who I have never met)

because they think the meet up would be anticlimactic if they didn't get alone time. Needless to say, I was furious.

I know I am just the friend and he is the boyfriend so he gets more time, but at the bare minimum I expected one thing blocked off for us...

I felt like some sort of glorified travel buddy for her boyfriend and I didn't spend $500 just to do that. After the Facetime

I wrote them a text letting them know I didn't think I was comfortable going anymore. I still planned to send my friend's birthday gift to her house,

but I did not want to go on the trip any longer. She immediately began back pedaling and saying we could change the plans,

and I rebutted saying she knew that I'd been coming for weeks and it just was not a priority to her to factor any time with me into her plans.

I've talked to some of my friends about this and they agree, saying I shouldn't go there just to sit in a foreign city by myself.

Others have said I was too harsh and should've just toughed it out. So AITA?

My heart really goes out to the OP here. That feeling is just awful. Can you imagine the mix of excitement and financial anxiety, only to realize you’re paying a huge sum of money to feel lonely and excluded? It’s not just about the money; it’s about feeling like an afterthought to someone who is supposed to be your best friend.

Her friend’s attempt to backtrack after being called out is so telling. It wasn’t a priority until it became a problem. The OP’s decision to cancel wasn’t just about a bad itinerary. It was a powerful act of self-respect. She was saying, “My time, my money, and my feelings are valuable, and I’m not going to pay to have them ignored.” Good for her.

Welcome to the Third-Wheel Zone

This story shines a massive spotlight on a classic friendship hurdle: navigating the transition when a best friend gets into a serious relationship. It’s a delicate dance, and this couple stumbled badly. A trip that was supposed to celebrate a birthday and a friendship was hijacked into a couple’s retreat, and they expected the OP to foot the bill for her own exclusion.

It’s a situation that screams of a lack of empathy and planning. Young adulthood is a prime time for these kinds of painful friendship lessons.

In fact, research shows that navigating friendships can be a major source of stress for young adults. The financial burden of social activities, especially for someone on a tight budget, adds another layer of anxiety. The OP wasn’t just being asked to be a third wheel; she was being asked to make a significant financial sacrifice for the privilege.

Friendship expert and author of The Friendship Formula, Caroline Millington, often talks about the importance of “friendship MOTs,” moments where you check in and make sure the relationship is still balanced and healthy. The FaceTime call was an accidental MOT, and it failed spectacularly. Millington stresses communication and honest conversations, which is exactly what the OP did when she sent that text.

She didn’t ghost or get passive-aggressive. She stated her feelings and her decision clearly and directly.

Here’s what the community had to say.

Redditors overwhelmingly came out in support of the OP, confirming she was not just a friend, but a travel accessory in their plans.

General_Relative2838 - NTA. Who would want to spend money to be a third wheel for a week?

andysjs2003 - NTA if you don’t have it $500 is a LOT to spend on a holiday where you are going to be a third wheel.

igormama666 - NTA! She’s only back peddling because she’s not done using you! Tell her the truth. Your not a 3rd wheel

Fit_Fly_9984 - NTA you friend and her boyfriend were treating you like a third wheel on a trip you had to pay for. Stay home and have fun!

marieennui - NTA. If they wanted alone time they shouldnt have tagged you along. I cant imagine being okay

with someone spending loads of money to see me then abandoning them with people they dont know.

Many users pointed out how mature and wise the OP’s decision to back out was, seeing it as a necessary boundary.

Walktothebrook - NTA. Their relationship evolved and you now recognize you would be intruding and cancelled your ticket. That was the wise and mature thing to do.

Intrepid_Source - NTA. Sounds like it wouldn’t be much fun for you... try not to let this ruin your friendship

and just let her know there’s no hard feelings but next time, you’d rather just a trip with her and not the bf.

[Reddit User] - NTA. Doesn't sound like any fun to me. Find another time to visit her when it's just the two of you and airfares are cheaper.

A few commenters recognized that the friend might not have been intentionally malicious, but was just incredibly thoughtless, which can hurt just as much.

EvidenceOk7759 - NTA. They forgot about you. I get wanting couple time, but they completely forgot that you would still exist

during that time and didn't factor you into the equation except when it was convenient... She just didn't think about it.

TripppingRoses - NTA but then again I don't think you're best friend was intentionally one either.

Seems like life shifted her priorities and she forgot she had a best friend, which happens and it sucks.

gingerlady9 - NTA, but I feel like the communication here is lacking... Sometimes, you have to

speak up for yourself, not just let others do the work, or else you will be stuck with a bad time.

How to Handle a Friendship in Flux

Finding yourself in the OP’s shoes is tough. Your heart says, “Tough it out for your friend,” but your head (and your wallet) are screaming, “Abort mission!” So what’s the right move?

It always starts with open and honest communication. The OP nailed this part. If your friend seems to be forgetting you in their new relationship bubble, it’s okay to gently point it out. You could say something like, “I’m so happy for you and [Partner], but I really miss our one-on-one time. Could we plan something just for us soon?”

It’s also about knowing your own limits. The OP knew that spending $500 to feel lonely was a boundary she wasn’t willing to cross. Setting these boundaries isn’t about being harsh; it’s about protecting your own well-being and being honest about what you need from the friendship. A real friend, even one who messed up, will hear that and try to make things right.

The Bottom Line…

The verdict is in, and it’s a resounding “not the bad guy.” The OP made a tough but necessary decision to value her own feelings over a poorly planned trip. This is a story that resonates with anyone who has ever felt their place in a friendship shift when a new partner comes along. It’s a painful but normal part of growing up.

So, what do you think? Was she too harsh, or did she do exactly the right thing by canceling? Have you ever been made to feel like a third wheel by your closest friends?

Charles Butler

Charles Butler

Hey there, fellow spotlight seekers! As the PIC of our social issues beat—and a guy who's dived headfirst into journalism and media studies—I'm obsessed with unpacking how we chase thrills, swap stories, and tangle with the big, messy debates of inequality, justice, and resilience, whether on screens or over drinks in a dive bar. Life's an endless, twisty reel, so I love spotlighting its rawest edges in words. Growing up on early internet forums and endless news scrolls, I'm forever blending my inner fact-hoarder with the restless wanderer itching to uncover every hidden corner of the world.

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