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Woman Cuts Off Family After Mother Leaves Everything To Sister In Will

by Annie Nguyen
February 12, 2026
in Social Issues

Growing up in a family where favoritism feels obvious can leave scars that never quite fade. For one woman, it always seemed like her sister was the golden child. Better gifts, more support, fewer consequences. Even teenage heartbreak turned into another reminder that she came second.

Over time, the pattern stopped feeling like a coincidence and started feeling like a clear message. The final blow came when their mother’s will revealed that everything would go to the sister, including the family flower shop she had dreamed of owning for years.

Feeling pushed out of both her home and her future, she made a drastic choice and cut ties completely. Now, after years of silence and a new life abroad, her sister wants to reconnect. She wants nothing to do with it.

A daughter felt written out before her mother even passed

Woman Cuts Off Family After Mother Leaves Everything To Sister In Will
Not the actual photo

AITA for cutting off my family over my mom's will?

I always suspected my mom preferred my sister over me.

Growing up, she spoiled my sister with whatever she wanted

and took her word over mine whenever we argued.

I was always in second place compared to her.

For example, when we turned sixteen,

I was given my aunt's old clunker that ended up dying within six months.

When my sister turned sixteen, she got the brand new red Volkswagon of her dreams.

Mom said that I couldn't continue my piano lessons because they were getting

so expensive while still supporting my sister's dance lessons, competions, etc.

Things got really bad about a decade ago.

When we were in high school, I feel in love with this guy,

Joey, and started dating him for a while.

Only to for him to dump me because he preferred my sister.

Yes, my sister seduced him.

This really broke me because he was my first love.

Well, my sister and Joey ended up getting married after their college graduation.

And that is when things went from bad to worse.

Our mother had her will made and she was leaving everything to my sister.

For background information, our childhood home was a two story building,

where my mother's flower shop was on the ground floor

and the apartment we grew up in was the second floor.

While I didn't get along with my mom or sister,

I loved that flower shop and had been working there for most of my life.

I dreamed of owning that shop one day.

But instead, my mother was going to leave the building, the shop and the apartment, to my sister.

While I could still work in the shop, my sister would be the owner and I would have to do what she says.

There was no use in trying to convince her to change her mind.

In her mind, my sister was the married one with a baby on the way.

She needed the business and house to raise her family.

Meanwhile, I was single and had nothing. So, I cut them off.

If my mother didn't see me as a family member, then I wanted nothing to do with them anymore.

It was clear who she favored more.

So I moved out of my childhood home and was on my own.

Less than a year later, I joined the Peace Corps and have been living abroad since. Now, to the present.

After not hearing from them for years, my sister found me on social media and reached out to me.

She wanted to talk to me, rekindle whatever relationship we had.

I told her no, that I never wanted to talk to her or have anything to do with her or our mother again.

She then starts to write this angry message

about how I could do this to her and why would I turn my back on her.

But as far as I am concerned, she is not my family.

She hasn't been family in a decade.

My partner and our baby is family.

I have a new, happier, more fulfilling life in South Africa than I ever did back in the States.

I don't want to ever see my old family again because of how they treated me.

I don't want them to meet my daughter.

If I let them back into my life, I am afraid they will ruin the new life I made for myself..

AITA and being too harsh?

Few things shape us more quietly, or more powerfully, than the roles we’re given in our families. The “responsible one.” The “difficult one.” The “favorite.”

When someone grows up feeling like they were always second place, the hurt doesn’t stay in childhood. It lingers, waiting for confirmation.

In this story, the daughter wasn’t just reacting to her mother’s will. She was reacting to a lifetime of comparison. The old car versus the new one. Cancelled piano lessons while dance competitions continued.

A boyfriend who chose her sister. And finally, the childhood home and beloved flower shop were left entirely to that same sister. To her, the will wasn’t a financial decision; it was emotional proof. It reinforced a long-standing belief: I was never chosen.

Her decision to cut contact may look dramatic on the surface. But emotionally, it reads like exhaustion. When someone feels chronically undervalued, distance can feel like dignity.

Joining the Peace Corps, moving abroad, building a new family, these steps suggest not revenge, but reinvention. She wasn’t only leaving them; she was trying to leave behind the identity she held within that family system.

Family Systems Theory, developed by psychiatrist Murray Bowen, helps illuminate this dynamic. Bowen proposed that families operate as emotional units, where each member’s role affects the entire system.

Within these systems, patterns like favoritism and sibling rivalry can solidify over time. One particularly relevant concept is emotional cutoff, when unresolved family tension leads someone to sever contact as a way of managing overwhelming feelings.

According to Bowen’s framework, emotional cutoff doesn’t necessarily mean cruelty or immaturity. It often reflects a person’s attempt to differentiate, to develop a stable sense of self separate from the family’s emotional pressures. However, differentiation rooted in fear or resentment can still leave emotional ties intact beneath the distance.

Viewed through this lens, the sister’s outreach becomes complex. From her perspective, she may not fully understand the depth of hurt. From the OP’s perspective, reopening contact risks slipping back into a system where she felt small. Both realities can coexist.

The deeper question isn’t whether she is “too harsh.” It’s whether her distance brings peace, or simply space. Estrangement can be protective and healthy, especially when family dynamics feel harmful. But true freedom comes not just from physical distance, but from emotional clarity.

Ultimately, no one is obligated to maintain relationships that damage their well-being. Yet healing sometimes requires asking: Am I closing this door because I am strong, or because I am still wounded? The answer to that question may matter more than the will itself.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

These Reddit users supported protecting her peace at all costs

Kittytigris − NTA, not from my point of view. You found peace and love elsewhere instead of with them.

No need to drag up all that toxicity again if you’re in a good place.

Current-Read − NTA, family isnt always blood its what you make.

You do what makes you happy, your responsible for your own happiness not theirs.

CarmineFields − NTA You don’t owe anyone a relationship.

This group felt the favoritism justified total cutoff

malachai926 − NTA. NTA NTA NTA to the hundredth power.

Your mom essentially disowned you. She deserves nothing from you at all.

And your sister is very much in the wrong here too,

like for allowing your mom to shower her with everything and to give you nothing,

not to mention wooing your boyfriend from you

and marrying him which is an incredibly s__tty thing to do to you.

I can't even believe these people are so clueless and so heartless.

Good for you for carving out your own life. You owe them absolutely nothing.

starvinartist − NTA she was the golden child

and when that wasn’t enough she stole your boyfriend.

Family doesn’t treat family like this. Your new family is your family.

TogarSucks − NTA. You spent your life with your mother and sister putting themselves first.

Even in reaching out to you, your sister put herself and her happiness before yours.

There was no olive branch offered, no remorse shown for her attitude or approach to your relationship in the past.

It was just “How can you do this to me? ”. She even made this about her.

If your happy with your life now, what reason did she give you

that you should threaten that happiness for her own?

Also, just wondering, you mention your mother’s will being

what finally pushed you to cut them out of your life, but just that she had written it.

Are your parents still alive, and have they made any attempt to reach out to you?

These commenters emphasized that no one is owed a relationship

[Reddit User] − NTA. If you don't feel the desire to have a relationship with these people,

you should not have a relationship with these people.

If you feel really generous, tell your sister: "I really don't want a relationship with you,

but since you want "sisterly" support from me, here it is:

If you have more than one child, love them equally and treat them both fairly.

Bye now. " Edit: thank you all SO MUCH for the nice words & awards.

Kris_Third_Account − Your mom is definitely an a__hole. Joey is also an a__hole.

Regarding your sister She then starts to write this angry message

about how I could do this to her and why would I turn my back on her.

A__hole. Sounds like you had a good reason to cut them off. NTA. Doesn't seem like you're being too harsh.

And if you change your mind, it's possible in the future to establish contact with your sister.

[Reddit User] − NTA. In Japanese, there’s a saying that goes; “siblings are just beginning of strangers”.

And I know that not every sibling are like this, but I know a lot that are.

Especially after your mother died, it might sound harsh to others

but I don’t see how you owe your sister anything.

TBH if I were you I wouldn’t have even gone to their wedding haha.

But I guess to go is just common courtesy.

However this anger that’s built up over the years can’t just simply disappear.

You do what makes you happy. Your sister and mother obviously did

what made them happy. You don’t owe them ANYTHING.

This group questioned whether old wounds deserved fresh conversation

Lola-the-showgirl − Honestly I think you could do with some therapy to unpack all this resentment

and anger you're holding on to.

Your mom obviously is a piece of work but I don't know why you have completly iced out your sister.

I don't really get why you're still hung up that your high school bf dumped you for your sister?

Like did she really "seduce" him or were they horny teens and he liked her more?

It was a total s__t move but not enough to be holding on to after all these years.

Did she ask your mom for the flower shop or was it just given to her?

I guess I just don't see how any of this is her fault.

Youre NTA because you're an adult and you can choose

who to cut off but I just think you may be throwing the baby out with the bath water here.

mbbaer − NAH because it sounds like the main bad thing your sister did she did in high school, "seducing" your boyfriend.

She was a kid, though, in high school, meeting who turned out to be the love of her life

while you got the love of your life too, plus a life beyond the flower shop.

But you're still letting your mother's choices control the relationship between you and your sister.

Honestly, it could very well be that your sister has wised up

to your mother's favoritism-bordering-on-abuse.

On the other hand, she could still be a tool of it. You owe her nothing.

But being afraid that she could ruin your new life from 10,000 miles away seems rather paranoid.

Anyway, she asked why you turned your back on her. Tell her.

At least that way you'll know where she stands on all of this.

Again, you owe her nothing, but after this long you should ask, what do you owe yourself?

To outrun the past or to face it?

A therapist (or your partner) would be better

to help you with that question than Reddit. But not TA either way.

These users expressed skepticism about missing details

redditnoobmp4 − This sounds fake. Like really fake. Like a cliche Cinderella type of story fake. If this is real then NTA

chrispythegull − INFO This story is missing a ton of detail on how exactly mom

and sister deserved to be cut out of OP's life forever.

Did sister cast a spell on childhood boyfriend and force him to marry her?

Mom just sort of decided to hate OP willy nilly? Where is dad?

I have a problem with how OP characterizes everything as well.

Owning the flower shop was her dream. Sister received car of her dreams.

OP got a clunker. Boyfriend was seduced. It feels so victimy.

I mean the central problem I have is this: If things were SO blatantly bad and SO rigged against her from the word go, then why on earth would she need to come to this forum and ask if she’s an a__hole, because if we take OP at face value, it’s stupidly obvious that she’s not?

Family can be the place where love feels automatic or conditional. Was she right to walk away after feeling sidelined for years? Or could reopening the conversation offer healing she didn’t know she needed? Protecting peace is valid. So is unpacking pain.

If someone made you feel like second place your whole life, would you close the door for good or crack it open one last time? Share your thoughts below.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

Annie Nguyen

Annie Nguyen

Hi, I'm Annie Nguyen. I'm a freelance writer and editor for Daily Highlight with experience across lifestyle, wellness, and personal growth publications. Living in San Francisco gives me endless inspiration, from cozy coffee shop corners to weekend hikes along the coast. Thanks for reading!

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