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Woman Refuses To Use Inherited Money For Half-Sister’s Life-Saving Treatment Due To Family Betrayal

by Annie Nguyen
December 15, 2025
in Social Issues

Inheriting wealth from a parent can come with not only financial responsibility but emotional baggage, especially when there’s a strained family dynamic.

After her mother’s death, one woman is faced with a difficult decision: should she use her inherited wealth to fund the medical treatment for a half-sister she has no emotional connection to?

Her father, who had a long affair with her mother’s mistress, now comes to her in desperation, hoping she’ll help save the child he had with his other partner. Her dilemma is not just financial but deeply personal.

Should she step up, or is it fair to say no to a child who isn’t hers? Keep reading to see the complex emotions driving this decision.

A woman is struggling with whether she should use her inherited money to help pay for her half-sister’s medical bills

Woman Refuses To Use Inherited Money For Half-Sister’s Life-Saving Treatment Due To Family Betrayal
not the actual photo

'AITA for refusing to use the money I inherited from my mother to pay for medical treatment for my half-sister, who has a life threatening sickness? She is the child...

When I was 25, we found out that my father had been cheating on my mother for years

and he had a 7 year old daughter with his mistress.

In one split second, the happy family I knew was gone, and I went through the darkest time in my life.

My parents divorced and per their prenup, my mother walked away with most of their assets

(since she also contributed more to the family income).

She never forgave my dad for what he did and never talked to him again,

though she grudgingly allowed me to have whatever relationship I wanted to have with him.

I eventually forgave my dad mostly because I was tired of carrying so much anger and hurt in my heart.

I talk to him but I want nothing to do with his mistress or my half sister.

My mother died last year and left me everything-her money, her real estate assets,

and her business, which I now own and operate.

I am in a relatively comfortable financial position, while my dad is... getting by.

He was never a good businessman on his own and lost a lot of his money on businesses that later went belly up.

This year my half sister was diagnosed with a life-threatening sickness,

and she has been in the hospital for the last four months.

The bills are mounting and my dad came to me for help because they are now in a situation

where they are finding it difficult to come up with money for my half sister's treatment.

The thing is, I don't want to use my mother's money to pay for the treatment of the child her husband had with his other woman.

Though it's not my half sister's fault, it feels so unfair

when I think that the money my mother worked hard all her life for will go to a child that neither my mother

and I have any responsibility towards, and the very same child of the man and the woman who hurt her so much at that.

I'd really rather use it to grow her company and let my dad and my half sister's mother figure out how to get money for her treatment.

They are her parents after all. The only thing tying me to her is my father saying "She is your sister"

and "If she dies because she didn't get the treatment she needs, would you be able to sleep at night?" AITA?

In moments of crisis, we often find ourselves caught between our values and our emotions. The OP’s dilemma is a heart-wrenching example of this struggle.

On one side, there is the desire to protect their mother’s legacy, money earned through years of hard work. On the other hand, there’s a complicated history of betrayal and pain stemming from their father’s affair, which created the very half-sister now in need of life-saving treatment.

The question isn’t just about money, it’s about trust, family, and the wounds of the past. For the OP, giving financial support to their father’s other child feels like an unfair use of the inheritance left by their mother, whose life was affected by that betrayal.

This emotional dynamic is deeply rooted in the conflict between fairness and obligation. The OP’s decision feels like a stand for what’s right: keeping their mother’s money away from the very people who contributed to her pain. Their feelings of resentment are natural, many would feel the same in their shoes.

When someone you love betrays you, it’s not just the act itself that hurts, but the ripple effects it has on every aspect of your life. For the OP, this decision is an attempt to hold onto a sense of control in a situation that has left them feeling powerless.

From a psychological perspective, the emotional pain of betrayal can linger far longer than the event itself. Dr. Sherrie Campbell, a psychologist and author of Loving Yourself: The Mastery of Being Your Own Person, explains that betrayal causes a deep sense of hurt that can take years to heal.

“When betrayal occurs, it can create a lasting wound, especially if the betrayer is a family member. The hurt is not just from the infidelity or the lie, but from the broken trust and the emotional distance it creates,” she writes.

For the OP, the emotional distance caused by their father’s affair and their mother’s suffering is profound. Their decision to withhold financial help may feel like the only way to regain some control over the situation, especially when they are faced with the person who represents their father’s betrayal.

However, this decision also highlights the need for emotional resolution. While the OP’s feelings are justified, they might also benefit from reflecting on their half-sister’s position. The child is innocent in all of this, and helping her may not only provide immediate relief but could also offer an opportunity for the OP to begin healing their own wounds.

Ultimately, this situation calls for a balance between protecting personal boundaries and practicing compassion. While the OP is under no obligation to help, understanding the emotional complexity of the situation could offer a fresh perspective.

Sometimes, acts of generosity, even when they feel unfair, can be a path toward healing, not just for the recipient, but for the giver as well.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

These users believe OP is in the right for not helping their half-sister financially

avocado__dip − NTA "If she dies because she didn't get the treatment she needs, would you be able to sleep at night?"

It's wrong of your dad to lay this guilt on you. His daughter is his burden.

While it's not fair for a little girl to suffer, I don't blame you for not caring about her wellbeing.

jessbelle27 − NTA and I'm so sorry you're in this position.

It's shameful your father is putting this burden on your shoulders;

I imagine he's scared for your half sister's life and desperate to find a life-saving solution.

Still very inappropriate and unfair to you, though. What a heavy situation. Have you talked to a therapist?

GeneralWaste_69 − NTA Your dad cheated on your mother and now wants to guilt trip you into caring for a child that he helped create?

Your dad, the guy who ruined his marriage and pretty much any good relationship with you?

It's sad for the little girl, but you have no obligation to her, and unfortunately that's the reality.

She's not someone you know, I assume, or ever had any relationship with.

girlonabalcony − NTA. The money was left to you by your mother.

I doubt she'd want it to be used on the child of the two people that upturned her life.

Also, if it's a life-threatening illness, she could still die even if you did foot the presumably very large bills.

It's understandable(ish) that your dad would ask but to manipulate you into feeling

like whatever happens now is your fault is SO messed up.

It's sad, but people get sick, and the fact that it costs so much to not die is a problem, but it's not yours.

OgMages − Nta. He's guilt tripping you, it's their kid not yours, not even your sister.

Yes biologically she's your half sister but you found out she was even a thing when she was 7, you owe no responsibility here.

dstone1985 − Nta as long as it doesnt interfere with your sister getting medical treatment, let them figure out the bills.

Millions of parents have to pay their own children's medical bills with no help

This group suggests that OP could have been more compassionate toward the half-sister, as the child is innocent in the situation and it would have been a noble gesture to help

HanzoSteel − Good lord, does nobody really see the problem with using an innocent girl’s life as a way to get back at your Father’s mistress?

Instead of bending over backwards to get out of helping, just do the right thing man.

I’m sure they’re not asking for ALL of your money, but just something to help out.

You didn’t like how your father and his mistress ruined your family? Break the cycle and be the better man.

You’re the ass hole and everyone in this thread saying you’re not is also an ass hole.

Why do people suck so much? EDIT: Thanks for the Gold and Silver! And the Platinum!

Illectra − I will go against the grain here and say YTA.

As a human being with feelings, don't you have the instinct to help another human being?

Sure, the backstory makes this situation a bit difficult but the child is not at fault for your father's bad decisions.

What would you do if it was just a random person in need?

Wouldn't you want to help just a little bit? You said you live a comfortable life,

yet this child has to think about dying because her parents don't have enough money.

I think any person, including your mother, would rather help a dying child than a growing company.

But maybe this is just a cultural thing as I think it would be my first instinct to help a person and then think about everything else.

centrafrugal − It's not an easy one but I'm going to say YTA for literally choosing growing a company over your sister's life.

Pretty much everything repulsive about American society is right there.

Scooby_Dru − YTA just based on the grudge you hold against your sister.

It’s not like she asked to be born into a fucked up situation

[Reddit User] − ESH. Your mother's legacy would be saving the life of a child whose conception over turned her life.

That would be noble. I appreciate that there are logistics to be looked at,

such as whether this would be a gift or a loan etc, what amount etc.

But I think even something smaller like an electronic notebook she can use in the hospital or something could be a really beautiful gesture.

This girl doesn't feel like your sister because of the s__tty actions of your shared father.

It's not her fault in the slightest and if you could throw her some kindness of anything I think it would be the best outcome.

This group acknowledges the emotional complexity of the situation and understands why OP made the decision, but also sees the other side, where a small act of help could have been beneficial

pottersquash − NAH. Basically answer this question:

If she was a stranger, and someone close to you came to you and asked for financial help, what would you do?

The honest answer is probably you would donate some cash to a GoFundMe or use your resources

to take a day to try and find them help, but you would not outright pick up the tab.

And thats fair, heck its fair even if she was your sister you grew up with in your happy little family that no longer exists.

At the end of the day, the real a__hole here is someone is dying,

there may be treatment and whether or not she gets it is a product of wealth.

And I'm not trying to be political, I'm just saying that you having money should not really matter

when it comes to whether she lives or dies so thats not a burden that should be put on you.

And sure your dad may think that, but he is desperate looking for something to save his kids life.

AtomicSamuraiCyborg − NAH ​ It doesn't matter what your mother would have wanted.

She's dead, OP, and it's your money now. So you can't hide behind what you imagine her wishes to be.

This is all on YOU. This is YOUR decision to make and live with.

You have no obligation to "do what Mom would have wanted" because she didn't tell you to do this,

you're deciding not to do it and justifying it by saying "oh well, I can't, Mom wouldn't have allowed it."

YOU choose to deny your half sister your help when she might die.

You aren't responsible for her, and your dad trying to guilt you to help is pretty s__tty, but he's trying to save his daughter's life.

If you're going to refuse, then at least be honest with him and yourself, that you don't consider her your family or responsibility.

I think it's obvious you still resent your father for breaking up your happy family,

but remember your half sister didn't ask for your father and step mother as her parents,

just like you didn't ask for your mother and father to be your parents.

She is innocent of anything your father did, and transferring any blame to her is wrong.

​ You don't OWE your dad anything, but helping other people is a virtue.

You don't have to be taken advantage of, but really consider what good your money is.

You didn't earn any of it, you just inherited it. It's a windfall that has nothing to do with your own actions.

A piece of good fortune that came from the tragedy of losing your mother.

Do you really think you will look back one day and say,

"Wow, I'm really glad I invested my inheritance completely into the company, and didn't help half sister at all.

The company's success is a greater moral and personal achievement than saving her life would have been."?

Because here in America, there is no 'figuring it out' sometimes.

Your sister is about to be diagnosed with another life threatening condition,

poverty, and combined with her first diagnosis, it's usually fatal.

There is no magical safety net that is going to catch her. Medicaid can very frequently fail, and leave sick kids to die.

[Reddit User] − NAH - Blood relations don’t make somebody family.

It’s unlucky that your half sister has been put in this position but you’re in no way obliged to help her in any way.

Don’t feel guilty about being able to do something and refusing to, you look out for yourself and people you feel close to.

aitathrowawayx − NAH. I don’t think he’s wrong for asking, but you certainly are not wrong for saying no.

I would feel just as conflicted about it. Tbh I think the a__hole here is the medical system

that puts people in severe debt, just because they’re trying to stay alive.

edit; i can definitely hear the argument for dad being TA for, what appears to be, guilt tripping OP.

I didn’t judge him as TA because I honestly cannot imagine what it’s like to have a dangerously ill child,

knowing the other child has the money available to help and chooses not to.

I think it’s too complex for me, personally, to definitively call him TA.

I hate the medical system for putting these two in this situation in the first place.

Should he have helped his half-sister, despite the history? Or is his decision to stand firm in his boundaries justified, considering everything that’s happened? Share your thoughts, would you have done the same in his shoes, or is there room for compassion even in the face of betrayal?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

Annie Nguyen

Annie Nguyen

Hi, I'm Annie Nguyen. I'm a freelance writer and editor for Daily Highlight with experience across lifestyle, wellness, and personal growth publications. Living in San Francisco gives me endless inspiration, from cozy coffee shop corners to weekend hikes along the coast. Thanks for reading!

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