Woman Sends Niece Back To Foster Care After She Let Friends Hurt Her Dog—Was It Too Harsh?
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Woman Sends Niece Back To Foster Care After She Let Friends Hurt Her Dog—Was It Too Harsh?

Annie Nguyen by Annie Nguyen
July 3, 2025
in Blog
Reading Time: 14 mins read
Woman Sends Niece Back To Foster Care After She Let Friends Hurt Her Dog—Was It Too Harsh?

Imagine coming home from a date to find your apartment trashed and your beloved dog cowering with a broken leg. A Redditor (20F) faced this nightmare when her 12-year-old niece, Mary, let friends wreak havoc in her home, culminating in her dog’s brutal injury. After discovering Mary’s giggles over the abuse, the Redditor sent her to foster care, sparking a debate over whether she overreacted or protected her furry family. Ready for the heart-wrenching details? Dive into the chaos below!

   
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Taking in her struggling sister’s daughter was a kind gesture, but Mary’s reckless behavior— from explicit texts to enabling animal cruelty—pushed the Redditor to her limit. With her dog nursing injuries and her trust shattered, she’s questioning her drastic move. Reddit’s howling with opinions fiercer than a guard dog’s bark. Let’s unpack this furry fiasco!

Woman Sends Niece Back To Foster Care After She Let Friends Hurt Her Dog—Was It Too Harsh?

One woman’s attempt to help her niece turned into a nightmare when the girl’s friends abused her dog, leading to a tough call

'Aita For Kicking My Niece Out For Letting Her Friends Hurt My Dog?'

So for back story, I(20F) have a sister (27F) who is a struggling addict. She had a daughter when she was 15, we will call her Mary(12F). I agreed to take Mary in a few months ago because my apartment has a spare bedroom and if not, she would go into foster care. My sister warned me before I took her in that she was misbehaved, but she was clearly under the influence, so I chalked it up to my sister saying things.

A few weeks ago, I come home to find Mary sending explicit pictures to men in the bathroom, and after going through her phone, I found some of them were as old as 17-18. I took her to a therapist because I believed she was doing things like that because of trauma, and she was using that to cope.

From what I was told, she has been opening up well. However, when I came home last night from a date, at around 10 pm, I found my apartment trashed and my dog scared, crying, and shaking in the corner of the room. I didn't see Mary, so my mind went to the worst, assuming someone had broken in.

I go into Mary's room, finding her all giggles and smiley. I asked her what the f\*\*\* happened to my house and she said that she had a few friends over. (Just to be clear, I don't mind if she has friends over, but the rule is that she asks first and I have to be home, incase anything happens.)

I tell her she knows better than to have friends over when I'm not home and ask her why my dog is crying. She doesn't answer, so I tell her to go clean the mess that was made, and I went to check on my dog.

I got close to her, trying to pet her legs like I always do, and she snapped, (something she has NEVER done before) and then saw blood around her mouth. I decide to take her to the vet.

When we get there, they see my dog and inform me that one of her back legs is broken and she appears to be missing two teeth. The vet says that he wants to keep my dog overnight and I agree to it.

When we get home, I ask what the h\*\*\* happened to my dog, and she tells me that she ate food off the table, so one of her guy friends 'punished' her. I tell her to go to her room and that in the morning someone will be here to take her to her foster home. Some say I am overreacting, others say I'm justified. I just don't want a girl who thinks animal abuse if funny living in my home..

TL;DR I decide to take in my niece, I have had issues with her behavior before, when I came home one night my dog was beaten to the point of having missing teeth and a broken leg, my niece thought it was funny so I had her removed from my home. AITA?

This Redditor’s home became a battleground when her niece’s friends turned her dog into a punching bag, leaving her reeling. Taking in 12-year-old Mary was a selfless act, but her troubling behavior—explicit texts and laughing off animal cruelty—pushed the Redditor to send her to foster care. Was this a justified stand for safety, or did trauma cloud her judgment?

Caregiving for a troubled child is no walk in the park. Dr. Bruce Perry, a child trauma expert, notes in a 2023 Psychology Today article, “Trauma can lead to risky behaviors, but caregivers need support to manage them safely”. Mary’s actions, from sexting to enabling animal abuse, suggest deep issues requiring professional intervention beyond the Redditor’s capacity at 20. Her decision to evict Mary prioritized her dog’s safety but may have overlooked Mary’s need for specialized care.

Animal cruelty is a red flag for deeper problems. A 2022 FBI report links juvenile animal abuse to escalating behavioral issues, with 60% of cases involving underlying trauma. Mary’s lack of remorse and her friends’ violence demand legal action, not just removal. The Redditor’s failure to report the abuse or sexting to authorities may leave Mary and others vulnerable in foster care.

Was there another path? A call to Child Protective Services (CPS) before eviction could’ve ensured Mary’s placement with trauma-trained caregivers while addressing the dog’s abuse legally. The Redditor’s youth and lack of fostering experience amplify the challenge. Neutral advice? Report the incidents to CPS and police, secure your home, and seek support for yourself. Mary needs help, but so does the Redditor. What do you think—right call or too harsh?

Reddit’s pack went wild, backing the Redditor’s decision to protect her dog while urging action against Mary’s dangerous behavior.

This commentor praised the Redditor’s intent but stressed securing the home post-eviction.

SparkleSlide − Reddit, I'm with you—this is beyond the pale. To the OP: you opened your home with kindness and got it repaid with a brand of crazy that's egregious even by madhouse standards.

Yes, everyone has a backstory with their own demons to fight, but it's like inviting someone to dinner and they set the tablecloth on fire—there's just no rationalizing with that level of disrespect. Protect your four-legged family member and get your home back. Time to show the door to this duo of destruction.

Might want to invest in some good locks and cameras while you're at it, because this level of crazy doesn't take a hint easily. NTA.

Another called Mary a liability, supporting her removal despite her trauma.

Ornery-Platypus-1 − NTA. Kick her ass out. She's a burden, a liability, and a psychopath all rolled into one.   You were doing her a favor, and she s**t all over that... her past 'trauma' is perhaps an *explanation* of her behavior, but it sure as hell isn't an *excuse*.

These Redditors advised OP to take legal action and call the police and CPS:

Another pushed for legal action against the abuser and reporting Mary’s explicit texts.

_pout_ − If anyone ever hurt my little girl intentionally, I'd go at them with all the legal clout in the world. Take your niece / sister / a**hole perpetrator if he's around (you are allowed to record without consent in public spaces regardless of jurisdiction, but not always in your home) and ask them separately to explain while you're recording incognito. Then try asking together.

Then call the cops, explain the situation, file a report and share the recording (they can give you their email for documentation as well), and tell the cops about the pictures you witnessed. Ask your vet to document the injuries and get x-rays -- get a copy for yourself. F**k this scum. If Mary is underage and the perpetrator is an adult, he needs to go to prison. Go to a lawyer.

This user urged reporting to CPS to protect other animals and kids.

AnnoyedRedheadedMom − make sure CPS is aware of this before she is put with animals, small children or babies.

This user demanded police and CPS involvement for Mary’s unchecked behavior.

No_Addition_5543 − Why the hell aren’t you calling the police and CPS right now?!   And why are you leaving a 12 year old psychopath home alone?!

This Redditor criticized leaving Mary alone, but backed eviction for safety.

Only_trans_ − I mean it’s common sense to not leave a mentally ill 12 year old unattended in your house - that’s irresponsible af - you get a babysitter or don’t go out. On top of that contact the police about the adult men sending explicit content to aforementioned mentally ill 12 year old.

Safeguarding is important and you didn’t do enough of it. I hope your dog is ok, no animal deserves that. NTA because it doesn’t sound like you’re equipped to provide what the kid needs.

This person also insisted on police reports for the abuse and sexting to protect others.

Odd-Artist-2595 − Oh, she has to go. But, you should be contacting the police about both the pictures and the animal abuse. They can arrange for her to go where she needs to be. The police need the contact information for the men she was sending her photos to. They need to go to jail for CP.

And, she can either tell the police who abused you dog, or they can only assume that *she* did it. One way or another, *someone* needs to face abuse charges and pay for your vet bills. You should **not** be turning her over to CPS without making sure they are aware of ALL of it.

Under no circumstances should some unsuspecting foster family be taking her in unaware—*especially* if they have pets in the home. Not sure I’d want her around small children, either. And, get cameras.

Those “friends” of hers now know where you live and what you own, and probably when you work. They are not afraid of your dog. Its presence in your home will not deter them in the slightest if they decide to take revenge. If you gave her a key, change the locks, too.

You have no idea if she gave it to someone who made a copy. Your niece needs some serious help. And, it is help that you are not qualified to provide—at least not safely. For everyone’s sake, you need to get the authorities involved. Police, as well as CPS. Good luck. NTA.

Some suggested that Mary need professional help:

Another suggested a psychiatric facility for Mary’s dangerous tendencies.

Rowana133 − NTA. She will do a whole lot worse and it's clear she is not to be trusted unsupervised. The only options I see are some sort of pyschiatratric care facility for the little pyscho(and honestly I'd talk to the case worker about taking her to a place like that.)

She's having inappropriate s**ual behavior, hurting animals or allowing others to hurt animals and shows no remorse for it. She has 0 respect for you, your property and your pet. She is callous to the point of being dangerous.

If all these people think you are going to far when she allowed the torture of your dog then tell them thank you and you will let the caseworker know they are volunteering to take the mini pyscho into their own homes. You should also see about getting her pyscho guy friends name and pressing charges against him.

This one noted the Redditor’s unpreparedness, urging trauma-informed care for Mary.

No-Resource-8125 − I’m not passing judgment here because of the situation. What I will say is OP was woefully underprepared to take in her niece. There is a reason the minimum age is 21 to foster. Plus, I’m guessing she did this through an informal kinship — which means she has no supports and guidance.

For OP, the niece and the dog, she needs to have her niece placed with someone who is trained in trauma-informed care — or get with an agency that can give you guidance.

This person also supported eviction, emphasizing Mary’s need for professional help.

Velcromutant_88 − NTA. Mary needs professional help. Do whatever is necessary to ensure yours and your dog's safety. I wish you all the best. You did the best you could.

This Redditor’s kind heart took a hit when her niece’s friends brutalized her dog, leading to a painful eviction decision. Mary’s giggles over the cruelty and her troubling behavior tipped the scales, but was kicking her out too extreme?

Should the Redditor have sought help for Mary first, or was protecting her pup the priority? How would you handle a niece’s dangerous antics? Unleash your thoughts below!

Annie Nguyen

Annie Nguyen

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