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Would She Be Wrong for Exposing Her Brother’s Secret Paycheck Lies to Their Parents?

by Charles Butler
December 11, 2025
in Social Issues

Money and family rules can get messy fast. In this story, a teen girl wonders if she’d be wrong for exposing her younger brother for hiding how much he really earns at his job.

Their parents have a rule: every paycheck must be split so that two-thirds goes into savings and only one-third is for spending. OP thinks this is a fair rule. Her brother disagrees – so he’s been quietly keeping an extra $3 an hour without telling anyone.

After OP threatens to tell their parents, she turns to Reddit for judgment. But instead of support, the internet teaches her a lesson about privacy, trust, and sibling relationships.

Would She Be Wrong for Exposing Her Brother’s Secret Paycheck Lies to Their Parents?
Not the actual photo

Here’s The Original Story:

'WIBTA if I told our parents my brother is lying about his paychecks?'

Fair is not an element of this discussion, or any other discussion really, this is about what makes sense (perspective), goals & boundaries.

It sounds like OP agrees with her parent's perspective, shares the same goals, and respects their boundaries.

Her brother does not (on all 3 accounts), to be blunt, that's his problem, and he's found his own solution.

If OP rats him out it will she will be seen as nothing more than an extension of the parents.

She actually already is because she gave him an ultimatum. OP, you're not a parent, you violated your brother's trust, and forced an ultimatum.

No one likes that, you may think he's immature but you can very easily be seen as a snitch, Narc, b__ch, and that is just another kind of immaturity

especially if you've been the "I'm telling" older sister his whole life, yeah, you're the a__hole

Why This Isn’t Just About $3 – It’s About Control, Freedom, and Family Rules

Even though $3 an hour doesn’t sound like much, the real issue is bigger. OP believes their parents are teaching them good habits, but Reddit points out something important:

When rules feel too strict, teens don’t learn responsibility – they learn how to hide things.

Research backs this up. Surveys from the University of Arizona found that teenagers who get some freedom with their money develop better financial skills later in life.

Teens who feel controlled often do the opposite of what adults want, simply because they want independence.

So OP’s brother keeping extra money isn’t surprising. It’s actually a very common reaction.

This raises real questions:

  • Do strict rules make kids responsible?
  • Or do they just make kids sneaky?

And should siblings be responsible for enforcing parent rules?

OP clearly thinks she is helping. Reddit strongly disagrees.

Is Telling on a Sibling “Doing the Right Thing,” or Just Being a Snitch?

Another big part of the conversation is about sibling loyalty.

Reddit users say OP is crossing a line by getting involved in something that doesn’t hurt her. To them, she is acting more like a second parent instead of a sister. Many commenters said she would destroy trust for no benefit – and that being known as “the one who tattles” is a terrible reputation to have in any family.

This situation brings up a simple but emotional question:

Do you protect your sibling, or do you report them to your parents?

Most people believe OP should stay out of it. Even if she thinks the rules are fair, they are not her rules to enforce. And even if her brother makes a mistake, it’s his mistake to learn from – not hers to punish.

Some commenters even said that parents forcing teens to save money can backfire. Instead of learning healthy habits, kids often learn to hide income and avoid talking about money honestly.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

When it comes to family, money, and trust, even small disagreements can turn into big debates – especially when siblings feel responsible for one another.

ReviewOk929 − YTA stay out of it. He is lying to your parents but he is the one who will have less money in college and at 21.

The down side here is you will f__k your relationship up with your brother over something that doesn’t materially effect you.

Mogwai_92 − YTA. When he turns 21 or goes to college he will have less and that's when karma will hit him. This isn't your place to get involved stop...

Dylaquill − YTA. He’s working for the money so let him use it how he wants. Why are you trying so hard to control your brother?

Some people see financial honesty as essential, while others believe that each person, even a teenager, deserves privacy over the money they earn. 

C_Majuscula − YTA. Stay out of it. It's likely he'll get caught when your parents help him file his tax return anyway.

rureki − YTA. Is it really such a big deal if he keeps an extra $3 an hour? Is it worth breaking any trust he had in you?

[Reddit User] − YTA since we live under their roof I think they have every right to do it Actually, they don't.

It doesn't matter under whose roof you are living, no one is entitled to your money.

Your brother is working and earning the money, it isn't pocket money he is getting from his parents that they have control over it.

Yes, they are trying to teach you how to handle finances which I think is a pretty good thing,

but at the end of the day, they can't force you to spend or save your hard earned money.

And OP, it is not your place to say anything. Your brother pocketing the extra $3 is none of your business and isn't hurting you.

Before looking at how Reddit weighed in, it helps to remember that discussions about family finances often reveal more about values, control, and trust than about the actual dollars involved.

Sunny_Hill_1 − YTA Mind your own business. Your parents' desire to teach him budgeting clearly backfired and he learned how to conceal his income and operate on "grey income" instead.

Let the IRS, ahem, parents, catch him in the act and see to the consequences, you stay out of it.

Puzzled_Machine7674 − YWBTA. There’s absolutely no point in telling your parents that. I don’t even know why you’d want to involve yourself, what do you want to achieve?

That your parents punish him? For 3 extra dollars? He’s 15 and already working.

He’s already more responsible than most 15 year olds. That needs to get through your head.

If he thinks he needs those +3 dollars per hour, let him have them. He needs to learn how to deal with money, give him his space.

What’s your motive, cause honestly, the only reason you said is that it’s „disrespectful“.

It’s not. It’s his money that he works for and at 15 he already puts aside money for a. ) college and

b.) for when he’s a bit older. Get out of his business and be a good sister

[Reddit User] − YTA Thats not a fair rule. It is a sensible suggestion that shouldn't be forced on someone against their will.

If he wants to decline the suggestion he should be able to, since its his money he earns.

Taking 2/3 of his paycheque from him against his will and not letting him access it is dangerously close to stealing,

even if they intend to give it back to him, because he earned it and can't access it for that time period.

If he ends up regretting spending all his money later, that's a consequence of his own actions and he'll have to deal with it, but it should still be his...

Also, stuff like this doesn't teach people good saving habits, if anything it makes them hate saving because of all the negative feelings they associate with it.

superjudy1 − YTA. Just because you think the rule is fair doesn’t mean he does. This isn’t your business at all.

Left-Car6520 − Your parents have no right to decide what you do with your money just because you live under their roof.

They can set rules for how to behave in the house that they are obligated to provide to you,

but they do not get to decide how you use the money you earn with your own work.

It is not disrepectful in any way for your brother not to tell your parents how much he's earning,

and you would be wrong for sharing that information with them. The money he 'pockets' is his own money and he has every right to it.

If your parents want you to save, there's some sense in that, but they're doing you both a serious wrong by dictating it rather than helping you learn to make...

What usually happens when parents enforce overly-strict rules like this instead of teaching their kids, is that once the kids are out from under that strict environment, they don't do...

Because they were never allowed to before. Don't snitch on your brother, and also start thinking yourself about learning to make your own decisions too. YWBTA

At the Heart of It, This Is About Growing Up – Not Paychecks

In the end, this story isn’t really about hiding income or following family rules. It’s about growing up, setting boundaries, and learning how to make good decisions.

OP thinks she’s helping her parents. Her brother thinks he deserves freedom. And Reddit thinks OP should stop trying to control him.

What this situation shows is simple:

Sometimes the best choice is to step back and let people learn things on their own – even when they’re family.

If OP exposes her brother, she might win the argument.

But she’ll probably lose something more important: his trust.

Charles Butler

Charles Butler

Hey there, fellow spotlight seekers! As the PIC of our social issues beat—and a guy who's dived headfirst into journalism and media studies—I'm obsessed with unpacking how we chase thrills, swap stories, and tangle with the big, messy debates of inequality, justice, and resilience, whether on screens or over drinks in a dive bar. Life's an endless, twisty reel, so I love spotlighting its rawest edges in words. Growing up on early internet forums and endless news scrolls, I'm forever blending my inner fact-hoarder with the restless wanderer itching to uncover every hidden corner of the world.

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