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A Best Friend Offers a Dose of Wardrobe Reality After Major Lifestyle Changes

by Believe Johnson
December 28, 2025
in Social Issues

We have all had that one friend who shares everything with us. We eat together and we nap together. We even share our favorite outfits for a night out on the town. It is a bond that feels unbreakable until life throws a curveball.

One Redditor recently shared a story about a very sticky situation involving a changing wardrobe. After both she and her best friend experienced some rapid changes in their bodies, they handled it in totally different ways. While one friend embraced the next size up, the other clung to the past. It led to an uncomfortable confrontation that has people debating the limits of honesty in a friendship.

If you have ever struggled with your reflection in the mirror, this story will feel very familiar.

The Story

A Best Friend Offers a Dose of Wardrobe Reality After Major Lifestyle Changes
Not the actual photo

AITA for telling my (26F) best friend (24F) she needs to wear larger clothes?

So back story: me and my best friend have been besties for over 2 years and we are the kind that nap together, eat together, share clothes all that.

Anyway, we both are a little over 5 feet tall and at the time we met both were roughly 125 pounds.

So we were skinny and went out a lot and wore skimpy clothes etc. FF to the past 5-6 months.

We both (at the same time) began gaining weight. Out of nowhere, rapidly. So NOW we both are around 160

and I am in large shirts and size 10-12 pants. Okay? I’ve accepted it. I don’t mind being in large clothes.

But here’s the problem… she DOES mind being a large. She still wears her size small clothes, underwear, bras that don’t clip shut.

If you are thinking “is it that bad?” YES. It’s that bad. She is in such DEEP denial that she’s “fat” — I prefer “juicy”,

that she literally embarrassed me at my 6 year olds football game last week because she came to this CHILDREN’S FOOTBALL GAME

in a size SMALL black cocktail dress, expecting positive attention?? Idk. So anyway TODAY, she texted me and asked if I would sell her

my retired rave outfits (raves were in my skinny days so they’re all small and XS) and I told her no!

That she would look ridiculous! And she says I’m being mean… I told her that mean and realistic are not the same.

She disagrees and is mad at me. AM I THE A__HOLE????

Oh, honey, my heart really goes out to both of these ladies. It is so hard to see your body change in ways you did not expect. I truly feel for the friend who is struggling with her reflection. Denial is a very cozy place to hide when the truth feels overwhelming.

However, I also understand the Redditor’s perspective. It is painful to watch someone you love walk into a situation where they might be judged or feel physically uncomfortable. Honesty can feel like a cold splash of water, even when it comes from a place of deep care.

It seems like this friendship is going through some major growing pains. Transitioning into the psychological reasons behind this behavior shows just how common this really is.

Expert Opinion

Coming to terms with a changing body shape is a journey that looks different for everyone. Experts often describe the struggle to buy larger clothing as a battle with “internalized weight stigma.” For many, the label in a garment feels like a grade on a report card. This can lead to a period of denial where a person continues to wear items that are physically painful.

According to research from Psychology Today, our sense of self is often tied to our physical appearance. When that appearance changes quickly, our brain can take a long time to catch up. This is sometimes called a “lag” in self-perception. A 2024 study on body image noted that social media often increases the pressure to stay a certain size.

Psychotherapist Dr. Jennifer Rollin, a specialist in body image, explains that many people believe their value is linked to a number. “When someone refuses to go up a size, they are often trying to protect their old identity,” she says. “The clothing becomes a symbol of who they think they should be.”

Choosing to tell a friend that their clothes are too small is a delicate act. It is important to remember that the person is likely feeling very vulnerable already. Neutral advice about comfort can be a more gentle way to bridge the gap.

According to reports from Healthline, wearing clothing that is significantly too tight can also cause physical issues. This includes restricted breathing or skin irritation. Ultimately, the core of the issue is a need for self-compassion. This story is a beautiful, if difficult, reminder that true friendship involves supporting someone through every version of themselves.

Community Opinions

The online world had a lot to say about this fashion-forward feud. Most people agreed that being a good friend means telling the hard truths before someone else does.

Most readers believe that being an honest friend is more important than being a “yes” person.
NomadicusRex − NTA - I say this as a fat person, it's NOT fat-shaming to suggest a person wear clothes that fit them.

ggboiz69 − NTA - Friends are there for telling us what is good and what's bad. I don't think you're being mean.

KronkLaSworda − "I told her that mean and realistic are not the same" Agreed. NTA

Many commenters shared their own stories about why wearing the right size matters for self-esteem.
Darthkhydaeus − As someone who is in the process of losing weight after putting it on for years.

Nothing made me feel worse about my weight than trying to fit into clothes that no longer fit. Wearing the correct size clothes makes you feel better.

Candi_Kane33 − I’m going to get down voted but NTA. As a friend you are supposed to tell her she looks foolish before the world does.

ACM915 − NTA- I'm fat and it something looked stupid on me, I would want my friend to tell me.

Some people pointed out that a wardrobe malfunction can be the most painful wake-up call.

[Reddit User] − I actually have a female friend that had denial awfully similar to your friend at one point.

She didn’t listen to anyone and at a public gathering one day her cardigan began to tear vertically. That was the wake up call.

Stunning-Cry-5165 − NTA she is delusional. Women need to be more honest with their female friends.

A few curious souls wondered if there was a deeper medical reason for the sudden changes.
HighJeanette − Interesting that you both gained the same amount of weight at the same time, what changed?

[Reddit User] − INFO: How did you both gain 35lbs in 5-6 months? No impact on my NTA Judgement, but thats wild.

How to Navigate a Situation Like This

If you notice a loved one is struggling with their body image, it is best to approach the topic with a very soft heart. Focus on the idea of comfort rather than the actual number on a tag. You might say, “I found these amazing new pants that are so comfy, do you want to go try some with me?”

Try to avoid using words like “too small” or “larger.” Instead, talk about how a great fit can make anyone glow. If they ask to borrow clothes that you know will not fit, it is okay to be kind but firm. You can say that those items are tucked away for now and suggest shopping for something new and exciting together. Keeping the focus on the joy of fashion is a great way to stay connected.

Conclusion

In the end, our bodies are just the vessels for our wonderful personalities. While this Redditor spoke a truth that was hard to hear, her intent came from a place of loyalty. It is a reminder that being a best friend involves some uncomfortable moments alongside the happy ones.

How would you handle a friend who was in total denial about their size? Would you tell them the truth, or would you wait for them to find out on their own? We would love to hear your thoughts and any fashion advice you have for staying confident during changes!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 16/24 votes | 67%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 1/24 votes | 4%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 2/24 votes | 8%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 2/24 votes | 8%
Need More INFO (INFO) 3/24 votes | 13%

Believe Johnson

Believe Johnson

Believe Johnson - a dedicated full-time writer specializing in entertainment and news writing. Her experience in various jobs related to movies and TV show news enhances her understanding of the industry, making her an indispensable team member.

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