A wedding gift is a gesture of love and celebration, not an obligation—especially when you’re not even invited to the wedding. One man learned this the hard way when his cousin, who didn’t extend him a wedding invitation, still expected to use his cabin for a week as her honeymoon getaway.
When she ignored multiple payment reminders, he canceled her reservation, and now the family is calling him “petty.” The internet, however, has a very different take.
One boy argued with his mom when she canceled his friend’s birthday plans to make him babysit for her date night
Dr. Julie Morrison, a licensed family therapist specializing in adolescent development, says this situation highlights a classic case of parentification, when a child takes on responsibilities typically meant for an adult.
“Even if a teen loves their sibling, constant caregiving can create resentment, especially when it replaces social opportunities and personal growth. This isn’t about the child lacking compassion — it’s about the lack of boundaries and support from parents.”
Dr. Amanda Reyes, a child psychologist and autism family support consultant, adds that siblings in these situations often receive little guidance on how to help.
“Parents sometimes assume older kids ‘just know’ what to do, but caring for a neurodivergent sibling, especially during meltdowns, requires specific training and emotional preparation. Without that, the older sibling feels helpless and frustrated.”
Practical Tips for Families
- Share responsibilities evenly: Don’t rely solely on one child for caregiving. Use community respite services or extended family help.
- Acknowledge and validate feelings: Telling a teen they are “selfish” or “disgusting” for expressing frustration only deepens resentment.
- Give structured roles: Instead of vague instructions like “watch her,” provide clear tasks (help her with snacks, monitor during play) and a time limit.
- Protect personal time: Ensure the older sibling has regular opportunities for social activities, hobbies, and rest.
Dr. Morrison stresses that this is not about “blaming” parents or the child. “Families raising children with disabilities face real pressures. The key is to recognize that every child’s needs matter, including the sibling’s need to be a kid.”
Take a look at the comments from fellow users:
Most Redditors sided with the teen, saying the real problem was not the sister’s disability — but the parents’ choices
