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Boyfriend Demands $4000 To Invent A New Color, Girlfriend Refuses, Questioning His Sanity

by Jeffrey Stone
December 2, 2025
in Social Issues

A 24-year-old woman’s boyfriend, 29, boldly claimed he’d invent a new color, chasing a rainbow-rewriting dream with a $4,000 price tag for art supplies, a lab coat, and a desert trip for “pure sunlight.” Her shutdown sparked a fiery feud, with him sulking and friends throwing shade.

Reddit’s buzzing over this clash of love and questionable science, split on dream-crushing versus wallet-saving. This vibrant saga of ambition and technicolor chaos leaves her questioning if she’s the villain in his cosmic art quest.

Boyfriend wants to invent a new color, demands 4 grand, girlfriend refuses, suspects him of having a disorder.

Boyfriend Demands $4000 To Invent A New Color, Girlfriend Refuses, Questioning His Sanity
Not the actual photo.

'AITA for refusing to fund my boyfriends ‘genius’ idea?'

I (F24) have been dating my boyfriend (M29) for 3 years, and while he’s always been a bit wacky I usually find it kind of endearing.

This time however, he’s really outdone himself. A few weeks ago, he told me he had a “groundbreaking” idea that would “change humanity forever.”

Entertaining him, I asked what it was. His answer? He wants to invent a new color.

Before we go any further it’s important to note we are both college graduates.

I graduated in Biochemistry last year and my boyfriend in Philosophy a few years before, which makes this all the wilder I guess.

I tried to gently point out that colors exist as part of the visible spectrum of light,

so unless he was about to discover some new wavelength, this might not be possible.

But he waved me off, calling me “close-minded” and saying he was “enlightened in a way you’ll never be”

At first, I just nodded and let him ramble about his “vision.” But then he told me he needed funding to start his “research.”

Specifically, he wanted me to give him $4,000 so he could buy “supplies,” including “advanced art tools,” a lab coat

(because apparently, scientists wear them, so it would make him “feel smarter”),

and - wait for it - a trip to the desert because he thinks the “pure sunlight” there will inspire him.

I told him absolutely not. I’m saving for grad school, and even if I weren’t, I’m not dropping thousands of dollars on his… whatever this is.

He got mad, saying I didn’t believe in him or his “potential to revolutionize human perception.”

He even accused me of being jealous that he had a “world-changing idea” and I didn’t.

It got really heated and he ended up saying a lot of things about using my card as he knew the details anyway.

For reference he’s been unemployed for a while now, whilst I’ve got a regular job.

I ended up saying some things I do regret, but a lot of it was retaliation.

Now he’s sulking and telling everyone I’m “unsupportive” and “afraid of innovation.”

His friends are backing him up, saying I should be encouraging his creativity instead of “crushing his dreams.”

AITA for refusing to fund his quest to invent a new color?

EDIT: In terms of drugs we smoke weed occasionally but haven’t in the past few weeks,

I’ve never seen him do any other drugs nor have I found any in the house. So I don’t know if I can really blame this on a bad trip.

SECOND EDIT: Thank you guys for all the advice, I’ve moved the majority of my money into my second bank account for now

which I’m pretty sure he doesn’t have access to. In terms of his mental health I’m not in the habit of sharing his personal history online

but seeing all your comments I do agree that this might be a mental health issue

and I’m going to attempt to approach him with the idea of a consultation tomorrow,

if anyone has any advice on that please let me know as I don’t want it to come across as insulting,

I know he was down after his job but the comments have got me more worried about more serious illnesses that he may have.

For your information, the Redditor has her point at: “Colors exist as part of the visible spectrum of light, so unless he was about to discover some new wavelength, this might not be possible”.

Theoretically, color cannot be “invented”. They are the way our eyes perceive and our brain processes light at different wavelengths. But let’s see if the experts and Reddit community manage to do such a thing.

At its core, this is a clash of dreams versus practicality. Her savings for grad school versus his vision of revolutionizing human perception. But let’s zoom out: is this about creativity, or is something deeper at play?

The boyfriend’s insistence on needing $4,000 for “advanced art tools” and a desert pilgrimage raises eyebrows. Yet, some Reddit users noted that new pigments, like the ultra-dark Vanta Black, are a real thing, often patented for artists.

Could he be onto something? Maybe, but his philosophy degree and lack of a chemistry lab suggest he’s more dreamer than scientist. His reaction, calling her “close-minded” and hinting at using her credit card, hints at more than just artistic zeal.

This situation taps into a broader issue: navigating a partner’s big dreams when they feel out of touch. According to a 2023 Psychology Today article, relationships often strain when one partner’s ambitions outpace shared goals, with 68% of couples citing financial disagreements as a top stressor.

Here, the Redditor’s protecting her future, but her boyfriend’s accusations of jealousy sting. Dr. John Gottman, a renowned relationship expert, once said in Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love: “Your personal growth depends on your relationship remaining safe and secure at all times, because if either of you feel the least bit unsafe, untrusting, or insecure, you won’t have the internal resources for personal growth.”

This couple’s spat shows a disconnect. His dream feels like a solo act, not a team effort.

Mental health concerns also bubble up. Several Redditors flagged the boyfriend’s grandiose idea and defensive behavior as possible signs of mania or other issues.

While not a diagnosis, such shifts can signal a need for professional support. The Redditor’s plan to gently suggest a consultation is a smart move, but it’ll need tact to avoid escalating tensions.

Couples therapist Esther Perel advises approaching such talks with curiosity, not judgment. For now, she’s wise to secure her finances, dreams shouldn’t drain bank accounts.

So, what’s the play? Open communication is key. She could validate his creativity while setting boundaries, like suggesting he pitch his idea to investors or crowdfund it.

Meanwhile, addressing potential mental health concerns with care could strengthen their bond, or reveal if it’s time to part ways.

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

Some believe the OP is not obligated to fund an unrealistic idea and question the proposer’s mental health.

SnooBooks007 − saying he was “enlightened in a way you’ll never be”.

With his superior enlightened brain he should easily be able to figure out how to make $4,000 himself.

NTA, but you would be if you allowed the delicate genius to demean himself by begging for money from a lesser intellect.  He's obviously better than that.

EDIT: My reply was obviously glib, but there is the possibility he's having some sort of mental breakdown which requires professional attention.

karptonite − Nta, but I’m concerned about him. This sounds less like wacky than like a possible symptom of mental or neurological illness.

I am not a doctor or a psychologist, but if someone close to me said this, and seemed serious about it, I’d be seriously concerned about their health.

WhatsInAName8879660 − Has he been evaluated for mania? That can sometimes lead to such grandiose thinking.

If this is out of left field for the guy you know well, I’d suggest a mental health checkup.

wotsname123 − Nta, but if this is new behaviour I would assume it's a mental health break.

Unrivaled_Apathy − Bipolar in manic phase?

generalized_european − This sounds like psychosis. YTA if you don't TAKE HIM TO SEE A DOCTOR ASAP!

Others suspect specific mental health issues like schizophrenia or mania based on the behavior.

cactirosewater − Real talk, has he also become very interested in God and/or death and spirituality lately?

This sounds eerily similar to a guy I know before he got diagnosed with schizophrenia

cynical_overlord1979 − NTA this is not a reasonable request. I am concerned for your that he said he’d use your credit card without permission.

If he’s in a manic phase (or otherwise mental illness flare up) he might easily make rash,

impulsive spends on your card. Get a new bank card and reduce the minimum allowable daily spend to the lowest reasonable level.

Some question the feasibility of inventing a new color and suggest alternative explanations.

NoSalamander7749 − NTA. Don't fund this. Did he get this idea from mantis shrimp? He got this idea from shrimp.

Jenicillin − NTA. Does he mean a new color of pigment or dyestuffs?

Because that could be a thing, but he would have to be a chemist to even know how to try. Does he smoke a lot of weed?

StAlvis − NTA He wants to invent a new color. Can I buy some pot from him?

I tried to gently point out that colors exist as part of the visible spectrum of light.

Oh it's much worse: Colors don't even actually exist. They're just perceptual artifacts.

Alone-Air1786 − Not all colors exist as part of the electromagnetic spectrum. Some are only perceived. Pink is a perfect example.

There is no wavelength of pink, it is a trick our brains play on us. Additionally, new colors are invented and patented all the time.

In this case, it isn't the "color" per se, but really the pigment used to bring that color into reality for artists.

There's a reason why "Vanta Black" is worth millions and why Yves Klein is a household name for artists.

There is a massive market for creating new "colors" for artists. It doesn't make you an a__hole for not supporting him.

I'm just pointing out your entire premise of "the idea itself is impossible unless you make a new wavelength" is wrong.

Others highlight red flags in the relationship and urge reevaluation or financial protection.

CombinationAny870 − NTA and the new color is the red flags he’s emitting.

Machine-Dove − NTA, but what does he bring to your relationship? He doesn't have a job,

he's threatening to use your credit card without permission, he insults you, and seems to be having some kind of break with reality.

I'd be giving this relationship a long, hard look, this kind of "quirky" behavior doesn't usually improve

This Redditor’s stuck in a kaleidoscope of drama, torn between love and logic.

Her boyfriend’s quest to invent a new color might be a spark of genius or a sign of something deeper, but her refusal to fund it feels like a stand for sanity.

Was she right to slam the brakes on his desert-bound dream, or should she have tossed a few bucks at his vision?

How would you balance supporting a partner’s wild ideas with keeping your wallet safe? Share your hot takes!

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone is a valuable freelance writer at DAILY HIGHLIGHT. As a senior entertainment and news writer, Jarvis brings a wealth of expertise in the field, specifically focusing on the entertainment industry.

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