Boyfriend Refuses to Watch Girlfriend’s Dogs for a Week, Calls It a “Boundary”

Relationship favors often reveal more than arguments ever could. In this Reddit story, a simple request about dog sitting turned into a much bigger conversation about effort, boundaries, and what partners owe each other.

Here’s The Original Post:

The Situation

A 20-year-old man had been dating his 19-year-old girlfriend, Sally, for about a year. Sally was planning to go on vacation for a week and needed someone to take care of her dogs. She asked her boyfriend if he could help by visiting her home twice a day to feed and check on them.

He declined.

His reason was simple. He lived about 20 minutes away and did not want the responsibility of driving back and forth twice daily. At the time, he had recently graduated and was not working or attending school while job searching.

A few days later, Sally asked again. This time, she sent multiple messages explaining why she felt he should reconsider.

She pointed out that he had the time, offered to pay him whatever he wanted, and stressed how much she needed the help. He still felt uncomfortable, not because of money, but because he felt she was ignoring his initial refusal.

That left him feeling torn. On one hand, he admitted she was right that he had free time. On the other hand, he felt pressured and believed his boundary was not being respected. Unsure if he was being unreasonable, he turned to Reddit and asked if he was in the wrong.

The “Boundary” Debate

A major theme in the comments was the use of the word “boundary.” Many Redditors felt the term was being misused. They argued that saying no to helping a partner does not automatically make it a boundary, especially when the request is reasonable and temporary.

Some commenters flipped the idea around. They suggested that Sally’s real boundary might be realizing she did not want to stay in a relationship with someone she could not rely on when she needed help.

What This Situation Really Shows

At its core, this story was not about dog sitting. It was about expectations in a relationship.

Many Reddit users pointed out that relationships are built on mutual support.

While no one is obligated to say yes to everything, consistently refusing to help when it is easy to do so can signal a lack of care.

Small acts, like helping with pets during a vacation, often act as tests of compatibility rather than chores.

The consensus was that while the boyfriend had the right to say no, that choice still came with consequences. In this case, those consequences might include damaging trust or even ending the relationship.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Many users argued that this was not really about boundaries at all.

Several commenters questioned whether he truly valued his girlfriend.

Others emphasized that Sally had offered compromises.

Final Takeaway

Reddit largely agreed that the boyfriend was not wrong for having preferences, but he was wrong for framing the situation as a violated boundary. To many, his refusal showed a lack of effort and maturity rather than self-respect.

In relationships, it is not just about what someone is allowed to refuse. It is also about what that refusal communicates. And in this case, Reddit believed it communicated loud and clear.