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Her Fiancé Makes $200K, But He Bought Her Ring From Temu

by Sunny Nguyen
October 28, 2025
in Social Issues

A proposal should be a moment of joyous surprise. For one Redditor, it certainly was.

Her fiancé popped the question with a ring she initially adored, a beautiful oval-cut “diamond” with a sparkling band.

But the surprise quickly turned to confusion. Then, anger and profound doubt, all because of one word: Temu.

Now, read the full story:

Her Fiancé Makes $200K, But He Bought Her Ring From Temu
Not the actual photo

AITAH for telling my fiancé I don’t want my Temu engagement ring?

This was taken down from the other sub so I figured I’d post here with an update:

My (27F) fiancé (29M) proposed to me a few weeks ago. It caught me completely by surprise, but we’ve been together for 3 years and things have been going great....

I really liked the ring when I first saw it and my friends and family all think it is stunning. It’s an oval cut with “diamonds” across the band.

I asked where he got it and he wouldn’t tell me where, but that he got a great deal on it.

I didn’t think anything of it until yesterday we were in bed and I was asked him if it was diamond or moissanite mainly out of curiosity. I don’t have...

He said he didn’t know and would have to look it up. When I glanced over at his phone, he was in the Temu app.

I asked him if he got it from there and he didn’t respond. So I asked again and he responded with something like “does it matter?” and left the room...

I spent all night so confused. Today decided to download the app and look up my ring and I found one that looks identical. I found the exact ring and...

He makes good money (200K/yr) and I feel like he could’ve shelled out some money for a ring better than one on Temu. AITA for telling him I don’t want...

After reading responses from my first post on the AITA subreddit (it got taken down) I was freaking out a bit. He came home while I was FaceTiming a friend...

He apologized for sleeping on the couch and that he needed time to think. He doesn’t see eye to eye with me on my concerns about the ring and says...

He says if the ring breaks he will replace it (but didn’t say it’d be higher quality).

I have people messaging me that the ring could be harmful to my health and that Temu has horrible standards for their jewelry and labor issues so now I really...

He left and went to his brother’s house. Usually I’d go with him but things are just tense. AITA for telling him I still don’t want it?. Update:

He came home this morning while I was in a WFH meeting. These comments made my head spin all night. I got like 3 hours of sleep so I admit...

Re: the gold digger rumors, when we met I was making more than him and often paying for his things, his high paying job is a recent development. I have...

I asked him what was going on, if there was anything he needed to tell me, if he was “testing me” by doing this…

Well that really set him off. “What kind of person do you think I am? You think I’m a cheapskate? A liar? You obviously think really poorly of me”… but...

So I asked why he was deflecting every question to victimize himself and to avoid my questions. He tried to leave AGAIN.

So I tried deescalating and told him I see where he’s coming from but I need to know if he still loves me. He was immediately apologetic and still wants...

He said I can just pick my ring out and buy it with my own money. He said he’s sick of talking about this and it’s “water under the bridge”...

I hear him out there skipping around and humming to himself all happily and it’s actually pissing me off. Maybe I’m being dramatic, but I don’t think I can handle...


This story is a masterclass in how a seemingly small issue, like a $38 ring, can crack open fundamental problems in a relationship. The issue isn’t really the price tag. It is the lack of transparency, the emotional manipulation, and the fiancé’s inability to address his partner’s valid concerns with honesty and respect.

He proposed with a cheap ring he hid the origin of. When confronted, he deflected, played the victim, and offered superficial apologies without ever truly explaining himself.

Now, he expects her to “pick her own ring and buy it with her own money,” effectively washing his hands of the entire mess. This is not how healthy partnerships thrive.

The True Cost of a Temu Engagement Ring

An engagement ring is steeped in symbolism. It represents commitment, trust, and a shared future.

For many, an engagement ring is more than just a piece of jewelry; it’s a symbol of commitment, love, and the intention to marry,” states financial expert Marguerita Cheng in Forbes Advisor. “The value isn’t necessarily in the monetary cost, but in the thought and meaning behind it.” 

The problem here is not merely about money, but about the thought and meaning behind a $38 ring from a company known for low quality and ethical concerns. When a partner earning $200,000 annually chooses such a ring, it raises questions about how much value they place on the relationship itself.

A 2014 study by Emory University economists, often cited in discussions of engagement ring spending, found that while excessive spending doesn’t guarantee a stronger marriage, it also implies that extreme cheapness can be its own red flag, especially when financial means are abundant.

The fiancé’s reaction, or lack thereof, reveals even deeper issues. His evasiveness, turning the conversation around to make himself the victim, and his refusal to provide a genuine explanation are classic red flags for poor communication and emotional immaturity.

Dr. K.R. Petersen, Ph.D., writing for Psychology Today, explains, “Stonewalling involves refusing to engage in conversation. This behavior can make the partner feel unimportant, unloved, and even invisible.” 

Furthermore, the OP’s concern about the ring’s safety is valid. Healthline and other sources have raised concerns that some ultra-cheap jewelry from platforms like Temu can contain harmful heavy metals such as lead and cadmium. [Source: https://www.healthline.com/health/beauty-skin-care/is-temu-jewelry-safe] The fiancé’s dismissal of these concerns adds another layer of disrespect.

Ultimately, this situation goes far beyond a ring. It exposes a profound disconnect in values, a lack of trust, and a deeply concerning communication style that could plague the marriage. The fiancé’s sudden cheerful demeanor after offering a superficial “solution” demonstrates his desire to avoid difficult conversations, not resolve them.

Check out how the community responded:

Redditors were united in their support for the OP, calling her fiancé a major red flag for his cheapness and deceptive behavior.

Apprehensive_War9612 - Temu? There’s real gold and real silver and real platinum and real tungsten and real stainless steel and real diamonds and moissanite on Amazon for [goodness] sakes.

A Temu ring tells me he wants a Temu marriage. Thoughtless, low quality, and temporary. No one needs to break the bank to buy an engagement ring.

You should do the best that you can and try to make your partner happy. But he basically scrolled on Facebook and picked you out something shiny. NTA

HunterandGatherer100 - Here’s the thing if this guy thought there was nothing wrong with this he would’ve told you where he got it.

The fact that he wouldn’t tell you tells me that he knows it’s up [messed] up NTA

Spinnerofyarn - I still say NTA. A Ring Pop is more romantic than a ring from Temu.

Many users called out the fiancé for his obvious lack of effort and the poor quality of Temu jewelry.

Daide - NTA. You aren't asking for a 5k ring, you're asking for a ring made out of a known material that isn't essentially from Claire's. You got costume jewelry.

Aggressive-Sample612 - NTA. I don’t care about how expensive a ring is, but the point of it is to last so buying it from TEMU of all places is real...

Sunny-Happy - I was with my ex for 15 months and he bought me multiple rings (not engagement) off of Temu. Not one lasted longer than a month. All turned...

katatak121 - Your fiance needs to know that the ring he bought you will not stand up to daily wear.

It is cheap costume jewellery from a country known for having dangerous levels of heavy metals in their products, it will tarnish quickly, and the fake gems will fall out...

Commenters also focused on the alarming implication of his behavior, seeing it as a sign of deeper relationship issues.

-BashfulClam - NTA. Bro makes $200k a year and can’t shell out $300 for a 14k Gold and diamond alternative engagement ring?

I totally understand not supporting the diamond trade. I totally get not wanting to spend $1,000’s on a ring.

To be fair, I don’t think this is as much about the ring itself as about what it shows about his values. He’s proposing to the love of his life....

Is that what he thinks you’re worth? Is he a massive cheapskate? Going to Temu for an engagement ring is like going to McDonald’s for an anniversary dinner.

It only makes sense if that’s the only option you can afford and you’re young and building a life on dreams instead of dollars at the moment or something (and...

That’s not the situation here. At all.

I would maybe get it if he was like: “I wanted the proposal to be a total surprise and I thought you might have a preference on the ring so,

I got this placeholder for now so you wouldn’t be proposed to without a ring, and we can go pick something out together that will hold up much better”.

But it sounds like this man straight up proposed to you with a ring off of Temu. He didn’t even know what “metal it was”. NTA at all for seeing...

znxncb - “What kind of person do you think I am? You think I’m a cheapskate? A liar? You obviously think really poorly of me”… but STILL he never gave...

So I asked why he was deflecting every question to victimize himself and to avoid my questions. He tried to leave AGAIN.

So I tried deescalating and told him I see where he’s coming from but I need to know if he still loves me.

He was immediately apologetic and still wants to get married. He said I can just pick my ring out and buy it with my own money.

He said he’s sick of talking about this and it’s “water under the bridge” now. He’s acting like his normal self again since this convo.

I hear him out there skipping around and humming to himself all happily and it’s actually pissing me off. Maybe I’m being dramatic, but I don’t think I can handle...

This isn’t about the ring‘s material cost; it’s about the fiancé’s character, his evasiveness, and his alarming pattern of avoiding conflict.

The cheap ring is just a symptom of a much larger problem concerning respect and communication. The OP’s gut feeling that she cannot handle a marriage with someone like this is a powerful indicator that she needs to seriously reconsider her future.

What do you think: Is this a minor hiccup that can be fixed, or a major red flag that indicates deeper, irreparable issues in the relationship?

Sunny Nguyen

Sunny Nguyen

Sunny Nguyen writes for DailyHighlight.com, focusing on social issues and the stories that matter most to everyday people. She’s passionate about uncovering voices and experiences that often go unheard, blending empathy with insight in every article. Outside of work, Sunny can be found wandering galleries, sipping coffee while people-watching, or snapping photos of everyday life - always chasing moments that reveal the world in a new light.

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