A 22-year-old’s pub chat with his cousin unveils a decades-old love triangle secret, sparking drama and a girlfriend’s scolding. Reddit’s AITA debates: was his family secret spill reckless or fair game?
Over pints in a London pub, the Redditor blurts out why their dads are estranged, shocking his cousin with a buried love triangle tale. His girlfriend calls it a betrayal. The story probes family secrets versus open talk, with users divided on whether his loose lips were a bold move or a messy misstep.
A 22-year-old’s pub revelation of a family love triangle secret shocks his cousin
















Our Redditor’s tale is a classic case of family secrets bubbling up at the worst (or best?) moment. The core issue stems from a decades-old rift between brothers over a woman who’s now happily married to one of them.
The Redditor shared the truth when asked, but his cousin’s shock and his girlfriend’s reprimand suggest he might’ve misjudged the room. So, was he wrong to dish the dirt?
Family feuds over past romances aren’t uncommon. A 2021 study from the Journal of Family Issues found that 34% of sibling estrangements stem from romantic conflicts or perceived betrayals.
Here, the Redditor’s dad felt betrayed when his brother dated his ex, even though they’d already split. The cousin’s reaction suggests he was blindsided, perhaps expecting a lighter reason for the rift. But why the drama now, decades later?
“Family secrets are baggage from the past that include some and exclude others, as well as burden future generations,” claims Jane Adams Ph.D., Ph.D., in Psychology Today. Our Redditor’s cousin might be grappling with a shifted view of his parents’ love story, much like how hidden histories can weigh down the next generation, turning a lighthearted catch-up into an unexpected emotional reckoning.
Adams’ insight nails the ripple effects in stories like this, where a buried sibling squabble over an old flame has quietly excluded cousins from the full picture for years.
In the Redditor’s case, that “baggage” wasn’t just his dad’s grudge, it created a family narrative gap that the cousin filled with assumptions, only for the truth to upend his cozy version of events.
Experts highlight how such exclusions foster confusion or loyalty binds in the young, prompting a sudden reevaluation that feels like unpacking an old suitcase full of surprises. It’s a classic reminder that what parents pack away doesn’t stay in the attic; it tags along to pub chats and holiday toasts.
On one hand, the Redditor was just answering a question. He didn’t badmouth anyone, and the story wasn’t exactly scandalous, no affairs, just young love gone awry. Reddit’s community mostly agrees, with users pointing out, “Never ask a question unless you can accept the answer.” Fair point! If the cousin was digging for dirt, he got it.
On the other hand, the girlfriend’s scolding and the cousin’s hurt feelings suggest timing matters. Spilling family tea while tipsy at a first meet-up might not be the smoothest move. A sober chat could’ve softened the blow.
This saga highlights a broader issue: navigating family secrets across generations. Should you spill or stay silent? A middle ground might be to gauge the asker’s readiness or defer tough talks to a clearer moment. For our Redditor, a simple “Let’s chat about that another time” could’ve kept the night drama-free
Here’s what the community had to contribute:
Some dismiss the cousin’s reaction as an overreaction, emphasizing he asked for the truth.






Others find the decades-long grudge and sensitivity absurd given the context.






Some view the situation as minor family history, not warranting such drama.



So, did our Redditor cross a line by sharing his dad’s old love triangle tale, or was he just giving his cousin the honesty he asked for? The truth wasn’t malicious, but the timing – over drinks, at a first meet-up – might’ve been a misstep.
Do you think he should’ve dodged the question like a pro or spilled the tea like he did? How would you handle dropping a family bombshell on a clueless relative? Share your hot takes!









