Some parents push their kids to succeed. Others… push them into problems they don’t even have. For one student, life at home meant growing up under constant claims that he had developmental disorders even after doctors said otherwise.
His mom insisted everything from school choices to music tastes to video game skills were proof of autism. But when she used the “you suck at video games” line one too many times, he handed her a controller and let reality speak for itself. What happened next finally shut her down.
The Redditor, now 22 and about to graduate with a double major, shared that his mom has been claiming he has autism since he was seven
This isn’t just quirky parenting. Psychologists note that insisting on fictitious medical conditions can fall under Factitious Disorder Imposed on Another, commonly known as Munchausen by proxy. It doesn’t always involve physically making a child sick. Sometimes, it’s about constantly labeling them as “ill” or “disabled” to fulfill a parent’s need for attention or control.
As Dr. Marc Feldman, a leading researcher on factitious disorders, explains: “When caregivers fabricate or exaggerate health problems in their children, it’s a form of abuse that can deeply harm self-esteem and independence.”
Beyond medical definitions, this reflects a common family dynamic: parents who project their fears or insecurities onto children.
According to a 2021 Pew Research study, 61% of young adults said parental pressure significantly influenced their career and lifestyle choices. In this case, the mom even discouraged vet school, implying he wasn’t capable despite his academic achievements.
It’s telling that video games became the battleground. Gaming requires reflexes, problem-solving, and perseverance. Psychologists at the American Psychological Association have noted that “action games can improve spatial skills and multitasking abilities”. Hardly the skill set of someone “developmentally delayed.”
So, what should OP do? Experts often recommend clear boundaries and therapy to unpack years of imposed identity. In family systems theory, refusing to play into unhealthy narratives is a key step in reclaiming autonomy. OP’s humorous clapback may have shut down the video game argument but the deeper issue is his mom’s need to pathologize normal behavior.
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
Redditors suggested fighting fire with fire, leaving dementia books around the house to mirror mom’s tactics
Some went further, naming it for what it looked like: Munchausen by proxy, a form of psychological abuse
Meanwhile, this group emphasized that OP wasn’t just dealing with quirky parenting, but active attempts to limit his independence
Others, injected humor, joking about Elden Ring’s infamous difficulty and how mom didn’t stand a chance
In the end, one student used humor and a controller to push back against years of unfair labels. His mom may never admit she was wrong, but the Elden Ring moment spoke louder than words.
Do you think OP’s witty response was the healthiest way to handle it, or should he have confronted his mom more directly? And how would you deal with a parent who insists on defining your identity for you? Drop your thoughts below!
