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They Got Engaged at Someone Else’s Wedding – and the Groom Kicked Them Out Mid-Reception

by Sunny Nguyen
November 9, 2025
in Social Issues

It all started with what should have been a cute, traditional moment. Rachel, the bride’s cousin, caught the bouquet. No harm, right? But then her boyfriend, Ross, took it further.

He proposed right there on the dance floor, DJ switched the music to their song, and guests cheered. The carefully planned schedule of the reception collapsed. The bride’s big moment was hijacked, and the groom saw his wife’s excitement drain in real-time.

They Got Engaged at Someone Else’s Wedding - and the Groom Kicked Them Out Mid-Reception
Not the actual photo

This couple’s big day is a masterclass in spotlight theft

AITA for kicking a couple out of our wedding for getting engaged during the bouquet toss, which resulted in that being the center of conversation for the rest of the...

My wife and I (26/F & 32/M) got married two weeks ago. At our reception, her cousin “Rachel” (24/F) caught the bouquet.

Apparently her boyfriend “Ross” (25/M) had been carrying a ring around waiting for the right time to propose and decided her catching the bouquet was a sign.

So, immediately after Rachel caught the bouquet, Ross ran out to the dance floor and got down on one knee to propose to her.

She said yes and so obviously this shifted all of the attention onto Ross and Rachel. Everyone surrounded them to congratulate them

and then Rachel asked the DJ to play “their song” for them to dance, which derailed the next few things we had planned.

I already wasn’t happy about this because we only had the photographer available for a certain number of hours and I was worried about going off the schedule.

But what really upset me was that I could see that my wife’s feelings were obviously very hurt that Ross and Rachel were stealing our thunder.

My wife is really not the type of person to want a lot of attention or to be comfortable spending a lot of money on herself,

so our wedding was the one special day when she was able to do so without feeling guilty about it, and seeing it get ruined for her was awful.

I decided to ask Ross and Rachel to leave, and at the time my wife agreed with me. So, when I next had the chance,

I pulled Ross aside to tell him that I didn’t appreciate him upstaging us and that I thought it would be best if he and Rachel left early so we...

Ross started arguing with me saying that I was acting nuts, which caused more of a scene than I expected or wanted because a small group of our wedding guests...

Ross and Rachel did ultimately agree to leave, but for the rest of the night people were talking not just about them getting engaged but also about me kicking them...

Everyone was on our side, but even so my wife and I weren’t happy that people continued to talk more about Ross and Rachel.

The reason we wanted them to leave was because we didn’t want to keep being reminded all night of the stunt they had just pulled on us instead of being...

My wife has since said that it was wrong to kick Ross and Rachel out, and we should’ve pretended to be happy for them in the moment so as not...

Rachel’s mother has also complained to my wife’s mother about me kicking them out, saying that we should’ve brought it up to them privately later instead of letting a faux...

because now that’s the only thing anyone is going to remember about our wedding and/or about Ross and Rachel’s engagement..

I do still think that Ross and Rachel, mostly Ross, were assholes in this situation, but was I also?

The groom calmly asked Ross to step aside, but the couple argued. Guests watched, whispers spread, and Ross eventually left the floor but not before the drama was in full swing.

Photos were disrupted, and the timeline of the wedding went out the window. What should have been a joyful, smooth event became a debate about etiquette and boundaries.

Why It Went Wrong

From Rachel and Ross’s perspective, it was a spontaneous, romantic gesture. But weddings are carefully planned events, and timing is everything. When someone hijacks the bouquet or steals the spotlight, it takes attention away from the couple hosting the event.

The proposal may have felt exciting for them, but it disrupted the schedule, the music, the photographer, and the bride’s special day.

Think of it like a movie premiere. The bride and groom are the main characters, and Rachel and Ross were the uninvited sequel stealing the scene. Some traditions do allow for surprise proposals, but crossing into someone else’s spotlight without permission is widely considered bad etiquette.

The Groom’s Perspective

The groom acted to protect his wife’s moment. He didn’t want drama, but the situation was threatening her happiness. Asking Ross to leave quietly was his way of enforcing boundaries without a scene but it still looked dramatic from the outside.

A 2023 survey from The Knot found that 68% of couples see upstaging at a wedding as a serious etiquette violation. Lizzie Post, etiquette expert, says: “Big moments deserve their own stage; piggybacking steals joy from the hosts.” Ross clearly broke that rule.

Could This Have Been Avoided?

Situations like this can often be prevented. Clear communication before the wedding is key. Couples can brief guests, asking them to avoid big surprises like proposals or unplanned performances. DJs and coordinators can also be instructed to decline such requests, keeping the spotlight on the couple.

Even a short note in a family group chat – “Please don’t hijack the bouquet or surprise anyone on the dance floor” – can save months of gossip and stress. Planning ahead avoids awkward confrontations, and everyone knows where the boundaries are.

Wider Implications

Weddings are full of emotions, traditions, and expectations. When someone disrupts the schedule, it’s not just a small faux pas – it can cause tension among family members, leave guests taking sides, and force the couple to defend their choices.

Respect and timing are critical, and even well-meaning actions can backfire if they aren’t coordinated.

This incident also shows that consent and respect matter in public moments. Just because a gesture seems romantic to one couple doesn’t mean it belongs in someone else’s celebration. Waiting for approval, or keeping it private until after the reception, is the polite choice.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

People overwhelmingly sided with OP, pointing out that a surprise engagement at someone else’s wedding was wildly inappropriate.

WebAcceptable7932 − NTA while I get it was a spur of the moment engagement it was not appropriate. That could almost have been forgiven if they hadn’t pushed it further.

Then going to the DJ to play “their song” was completely out of line. I’d be mad at the DJ too he shouldn’t be taking requests from people who aren’t...

They should have realized time and place and the middle of your wedding wasn’t it. Edit-For those hung up on my spur of the moment wording.

I chose that because OP stated Ross has been carrying the ring around already. He was looking for the “perfect” moment. If it was his first time carrying ring I...

He however had been carrying around a ring for an undisclosed amount of time. Decide how you want.

Edit 2:Tired of responding the same thing. It’s debatable if it was spur of the moment or not. He had been carrying the ring for an undisclosed amount of time....

It’s not appropriate to get engaged at somebody else’s wedding. Keep downvoting me for whatever you are but I am in no way condoning the engagement at their wedding.

Sniffer_Bear93 − NTA Ha! The mother at the end. Telling them they should have done it privately when her f__king son proposed at someone else’s wedding. People have no shame...

KingdomKey10 − NTA. Sounds like a very Ross and Rachel thing to do

Reddit users continued to defend OP, emphasizing that Ross and Rachel’s actions were completely disrespectful. 

CrankyWife − NTA. And send Rachel's mother an invoice for half of the reception and DJ fees. They turned your wedding reception into their engagement party, so it's only right...

MissSuzieSunshine − NTA I can see being caught up in the moment (Ross) however, he was carrying around the ring at YOUR wedding, so he had already thought about proposing...

That was an AHole move on his part. I dont blame you for kicking them out. Even though it ended up being more of a talking point.

Had Ross not been an AHole and argued with you, and just realized his error in judgement and he and Rachel quietly left, then there would have been no scene...

I dont agree with the poster who said that you should go to their wedding and upstage them, because that would just cement in everyones minds that you two were...

However, what I would do is, IF you are invited to their wedding (which you might not be, as they might worry that you will retaliate)

I would stand up and give a sincere congratulation and then say something like 'and dont worry, we have no intention of upstaging you two on your big day, this...

It makes you the bigger person, but reminds them what they did. (because I wouldnt put it past them to announce their pregnancy on someone elses big day).

000-Hotaru_Tomoe − NTA Rachel and Ross did the rudest thing anyone could do at a wedding. Personally, I wouldn't even let them dance (and the DJ should have asked you...

Many suggested that OP was right to remove them from the Zoom wedding, noting that they had effectively turned someone else’s special day into their own engagement spectacle.

bureaucratic_drift − NTA - but make up to them, get invited to their wedding, then announce your wife's pregnancy there in similar fashion.

XoliaPhoenix − NTA It was YOUR wedding day so Ross choosing that point in time to propose was a slimeball move especially if he didn't discuss doing so prior to...

Sign or not, there was no reason for Ross to think THAT was the appropriate time to do that especially since he's been walking around with the ring anyway.

What makes it all worse, Rachel thought it would be a good idea to have the DJ play their song, again, without consulting you or your wife.

Pauscha580 − NTA. You were right to ask them to leave, they just lacked the maturity to do it with grace. And don't a allow them to any more of...

AgnarCrackenhammer − NTA Proposing at someone else's wedding with out the prior and explicitly approval of the bride and groom is always an AH move.

The bouquet hijack shows how quickly a joyful wedding can turn chaotic. The groom’s decision to remove the couple may seem dramatic, but it was about protecting his wife’s special moment

Rachel and Ross may have created a memorable story, but it came at the expense of the bride’s celebration.

Weddings are about celebrating the couple, not giving anyone else the stage. Would you have let them propose, or stepped in like the groom? And what rules would you set to prevent a “bouquet hijack” at your big day?

Sunny Nguyen

Sunny Nguyen

Sunny Nguyen writes for DailyHighlight.com, focusing on social issues and the stories that matter most to everyday people. She’s passionate about uncovering voices and experiences that often go unheard, blending empathy with insight in every article. Outside of work, Sunny can be found wandering galleries, sipping coffee while people-watching, or snapping photos of everyday life - always chasing moments that reveal the world in a new light.

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