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Couple Uninvites Friend From Wedding But Still Wants To Use His Property, He Refuses

by Leona Pham
February 23, 2026
in Social Issues

Friendships often survive breakups, new relationships, and even marriages. When people move on and build new lives, the past usually becomes little more than a footnote. Still, old history has a way of resurfacing at the worst possible time, especially when big milestones are on the horizon.

In this story, a man offered his property as the venue for his best friend’s small wedding. Everything seemed settled until a revelation about their past relationship created tension between the bride and groom. Suddenly, the plan changed in a way no one expected.

Now he is being accused of sabotaging the wedding after refusing a surprising request. Scroll down to see what led to this awkward standoff.

A man agreed to host his best friend’s wedding on his property

Couple Uninvites Friend From Wedding But Still Wants To Use His Property, He Refuses
Not the actual photo

AITA for not letting my best friend have her wedding on my property after being uninvited?

One of my (29M) best friends “Carla” (31f) is getting married soon.

It’s only meant to be a small backyard type of wedding but they’ve been planning it

for a few months now and originally it was supposed to be on my property.

They wanted it because it’s private, has lots of open space for the reception,

a nice view and the house could be used for them to get ready and stuff.

Of course I said yes, she and her fiancé “Rick” were very happy.

Thing is Carla and I do have a history.

We went out on & off in college but decided to stay friends.

Then I met my wife, we got married, Carla met Rick and now here they are.

Now my wife knows I went out with Carla back in college and she didn’t care.

Carla still went to our wedding and everything.

I never knew if Rick was told or not, it’s not my relationship

therefore not my business to say anything so I never did.

Rick found out recently and not in the best way.

Not sure how but from what I heard from friends is that one mutual friend told him (no idea why) we used to date.

Not only that but apparently Carla said a couple years ago

she was still in love with me when she was already dating Rick.

Don’t have actual confirmation if that’s exactly what he was told.

All Carla’s told me is that Rick was told about our past and he’s angry at her for never saying anything.

It became quite a drama and didnt hear from her for over a month until now.

She told me they’re going to couples counseling and that the wedding is still on.

But Rick requested that I not attend.

It sucks but I totally get why he wouldn’t be comfortable.

Then I asked the obvious question, where are they going to hold the wedding then?

To my surprise she said they still want it at our place.

Rick said so to and in my mind I’m going “he doesn’t want the guy who dated his fiancée years ago at the wedding,

but still wants the wedding at his house.” My wife and I are expected

to just... not be at our home that weekend, And I told Carla no.

They’re going to have to find some place else

since we’re not going to simply leave our home to them for the weekend.

Not only for safety reasons but it just doesn’t make sense.

Rick doesn’t want me around because he’s not comfortable

but is comfortable enough to have their wedding at my house?

They really want their wedding here though and because of that I’ve been bugged by not only her

but also Rick and some friends who think I’m being a petty a__hole

for not letting them have the wedding here anymore.

Honestly don’t think that I am, it just doesn’t make sense at all to have to leave our own place

for a wedding we’re no longer welcome to and leaving our home totally vulnerable.

Still, being accused of sabotaging their wedding and Rick believes it’s the least I can do after everything. AITA?

UPDATE: Some stuff has happened recently and many of you have wanted an update on this.

Appreciate the reassurance and understanding my decision when seems that many in this situation didn’t.

I remained firm in my decision about not letting them use my property for their wedding.

Even if they changed their mind about inviting us which honestly I don’t care about anymore.

Rick’s family (thanks to him) got a hold of my cell so that was more people I had to deal with.

I put my foot down with Rick a few days ago and told him directly

that I will go to the police and press charges for harassment (I have all the texts and calls documented).

Also had a very long talk with Carla about everything going on.

She apologized for it all. And she knows it’s her own fault.

Well she decided to be the one to call things off in the end.

Some of my friends still seem to think it’s my fault and I’m taking some distance from them for a while.

And also from Carla after getting some confirmation on a few things that I needed to know.

Whole thing is a mess.

I’m only glad in the end that I didn’t give in to their demands and the constant bugging has stopped..

It still was a huge headache over the last few days and not the kind of drama I want back in my life.

Thank you to everyone who made me feel supported in this.

It helped a lot not feeling like the only other person (aside from my wife),

who thought their demand was insane and inappropriate.

Sometimes the most uncomfortable conflicts arise when kindness collides with insecurity. In this situation, the man wasn’t simply deciding whether to lend his property for a wedding. He was navigating a sudden shift in trust, friendship, and personal boundaries.

He had originally offered his home as a gesture of generosity toward a longtime friend. But once her fiancé discovered their past relationship and requested that he not attend the wedding, the emotional landscape changed.

The favor transformed into something deeply contradictory: he was expected to provide the space, yet remove himself from it entirely. That kind of request can feel both rejecting and exploitative at the same time, placing him in a position where generosity suddenly felt like obligation.

A different perspective reveals how jealousy often reshapes logic. When someone feels threatened in a relationship, they may try to remove reminders of uncertainty rather than confront the insecurity itself.

From the fiancé’s point of view, the property might represent the perfect venue, while the homeowner represents a symbol of past romantic history.

In this mindset, separating the space from the person can feel like a solution, even if it appears irrational to others. What looks like entitlement from the outside may reflect anxiety and fear about relationship stability.

The request to exclude him while still using his home may be less about disrespect and more about trying to control an environment that feels emotionally unpredictable.

Psychologist David Ludden explains that jealousy is often tied to anxious attachment, a relationship style in which people react strongly to perceived threats to their bond.

He notes that individuals with anxious attachment frequently try to control situations or surroundings to reduce insecurity rather than address the underlying fear directly.

While these behaviors are attempts to protect the relationship, they can unintentionally strain others and create unrealistic expectations. Understanding attachment styles can help explain why jealousy leads to rigid or contradictory demands in moments of emotional uncertainty.

Seen through this lens, the situation becomes less about pettiness and more about boundaries. The fiancé may believe removing the man from the wedding will calm his fears, while still clinging to the venue that represents the ideal celebration.

Yet controlling logistics rarely resolves emotional insecurity. Instead, it shifts the burden onto someone outside the relationship. Declining the request becomes a way of restoring balance and protecting personal boundaries rather than sabotaging the wedding.

Moments like this remind us that generosity should never require self-erasure. Supporting friends is meaningful, but healthy relationships depend on recognizing when kindness has turned into an unreasonable expectation.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

These Reddit users found the request strange and supported the homeowner’s decision

pomme_dor − Rick doesn't want to get married anymore

but doesn't want to be the bad guy breaking up with his fiancee,

so he's put her in an impossible position so he can get the sympathy when they split.NTA.

WonderfulAtmosphere − NTA. what a weird request. Do you typically host wedding receptions on your property?

He can go pay for a venue if he’s going to act like that.. if they even end up getting married.

DelightfulAbsurdity − NTA, if he is uncomfortable by your presence,

he is welcome to shell out a deposit on short notice for another venue.

No way in hell would I allow myself to be run off my own property

by an insecure man to use as he sees fit, even just for a day.

Malicious destruction on top of typical wedding party mess? No, thank you.

This group believed the groom was projecting insecurity and misplacing blame

snootnoots − Holy cow, NTA.“Rick believes it’s the least I can do after everything.” After what?

After he found out his fiancée said she still had feelings for you?

After he got mad at his fiancée for hiding details from her past, because she knew he wouldn’t like them?

After you… broke up amicably with her long before they got together, moved on,

got married to a different woman, and were going to do them a huge favour? !

The things he’s mad about are all things Carla did.

He’s displacing his anger onto you as a “safe” target, because he doesn’t want to break up with her

and doesn’t know how to work through anger and trust issues in a healthy way,

therefore it has to be your fault… somehow.

Hopefully their couples therapist will work out what’s going on and help him get through it to a more healthy mindset,

but that’s not your problem, and neither is the question of where they’re going

to hold the wedding now that Rick’s completely torpedoed the original plan.

nathashanails − NTA. It’s absolutely ridiculous that they not only uninvited you,

but that they still expect you to let them have the wedding on your property.

How can they honestly expect to just kick you out of your own home for a weekend?

Are they even paying you to let them have their wedding at your place?

[Reddit User] − NTA They are not entitled to your property. You were doing them a favor.

Status_Percentage − NTA. Rick is being delusional and seems to have insecurity and jealousy issues.

If this is how he is, I don't see the marriage lasting long.

[Reddit User] − Nta So you're not invited because you had history,

but they're fine enough to still take advantage of YOUR home? The audacity.

Don't be surprised if they get drunk and start trashing your home.

They're just cheapskates.

These commenters emphasized property rights and called the request entitled

Knitsanity − NTA. I am astounded that anyone would think otherwise

This would probably also do well on r/choosingbeggars.

No way should you allow your property to be used. Lol.

LurkingToaster66 − NTA, its your property. That is some crazy entitlement.

stormyllewellynn − Lmao are you serious 😂😂😂 the level of entitlement here is atrocious.

No, there is absolutely no way they should be having their wedding at your house after that.

And if Carla is for it, then that’s not your friend. NTA.

Also. Rick thinks it’s the least you can do after everything?

What? Going out with your friend before you had any idea of his existence?

My god. Just rolled my eyes so hard, they got stuck. Brb.

kgrimmburn − and Rick believes it’s the least I can do after everything After everything?

What was everything? Dated his fiance years before he knew her?

Or was everything him being an immature, jealous AH? This is on him.

And he probably doesn't like that but everything is his fault. NTA.

[Reddit User] − Carla is a SPINELESS and GREEDY person.

She demands her wedding to supersede everything including her childish, selfish decisions (and cover-ups).

Now she's whining about when her pathetic choices start to blow up in her face.

Her fiance matches her personality. NTA.

These users joked about the irony while backing the refusal

spinly_jaye − You know who was doing the sabotaging?

That rando friend that casually mentioned to Rick that y’all dated

and tacked on the she’s still in love with you bit.

That person is a toxic s__t disturber.

NTA for refusing them the venue, but if they still really want it make them pay venue prices for its use.

Don’t give them your house tho, yard only.

OkapiEli − So RIck thinks this is the least you can do after “everything” … meaning, after you had her first? ?!

Omg, I wish her luck with that one.

NTA. I don’t think there should be a wedding at all, and since your question is about the location,

Nope, not at your place.

Weddings often bring out strong emotions, but they can also reveal unexpected contradictions in friendships and boundaries. In this case, a generous favor turned into a complicated social puzzle that left everyone feeling awkward and defensive.

Many readers felt the homeowner’s refusal was reasonable, while others wondered whether the friendship could survive the fallout.

What would you do in this situation? Would you step aside for the big day or protect your boundaries and your home? Share your thoughts below.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

Leona Pham

Leona Pham

Hi, I'm Leona. I'm a writer for Daily Highlight and have had my work published in a variety of other media outlets. I'm also a New York-based author, and am always interested in new opportunities to share my work with the world. When I'm not writing, I enjoy spending time with my family and friends. Thanks for reading!

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