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Husband Makes His Own Lunch Until MIL Kicks In, Now Wife Makes Lunch For Nobody

by Jeffrey Stone
January 19, 2026
in Social Issues

A heavily pregnant stay-at-home mom welcomed her struggling mother-in-law into the home out of kindness, but small intrusions soon escalated: furniture rearranged without asking, picky demands about the kids’ cereal, and sharp judgments on household routines.

Tensions peaked when the mother-in-law confronted her over not waking extra early to prepare her grown son’s work lunch. The mom snapped under the pressure, only to face silent treatment from both her husband and his mother until she apologized and gave in.

A pregnant stay-at-home mom refuses to wake extra early for her husband’s lunch amid mother-in-law oversteps.

Husband Makes His Own Lunch Until MIL Kicks In, Now Wife Makes Lunch For Nobody
Not the actual photo.

'WIBTA for refusing to pack my husband’s lunch?'

My husband (35M) and I (28F) have 2 beautiful children (5M, 3F) and I am currently pregnant with my third child.

Recently, my MIL has fallen onto hard times and lost her apartment. My husband invited her to live with us,

which I wasn’t originally happy about because with the little one on the way I wanted time to focus on our family,

but I ultimately understood that it’s a special circumstance. The problem is that MIL has really changed since she got here.

We used to have a relatively good relationship, but she’s increasingly been demanding and unreasonable.

I know it’s a hard time, so I’ve tried to be accommodating, but it’s all getting to be too much.

For example, she’s been asking that we buy specific brands when getting groceries, which would be fine if they were just for her,

but she’s been insisting that the cereal brand we feed my kids isn’t healthy and they have to eat a different brand.

The one we buy is the one they like and it’s not particularly unhealthy as far as cereals go.

She’s also been moving our furniture around, primarily the guest room that she’s staying in

but recently she had my husband swap the couch and the armchair in the living room while I was out running errands.

All this is fine, I love my husband and my MIL and can understand what she’s going through, so I can deal with it.

It all finally came to a boiling point last night. My husband and I have been having a disagreement lately.

Usually, my husband makes his own lunch to take with him to work.

However, since I’ve recently quit my job to become a stay at home mom, he thinks I should start making his lunch along with the children’s lunches.

My husband goes to work an hour and a half before the children go to daycare.

I currently wake up around the time he leaves for work and have plenty of time to get the kids ready and make their lunches.

If I were to make his lunch, I would have to get up way earlier. We’re at an impasse on this issue right now.

Apparently, he complained to his mother about it, because she confronted me last night about being a bad wife.

In her words, I’m “not good enough” for her son if I can’t even “make this one sacrifice to make him happy”.

Being confronted like this just made me so mad and I don’t even know why. I snapped and yelled back at her and said some things I regret.

Now my husband expects me to give my MIL an apology and start packing his lunch, and neither of them are talking to me until then.

My husband and I have never had problems like this before. He’s always been so good to me.

I’m worried that I’m overreacting and making and already difficult time even harder.

I’ve never snapped like that before but I just feel so overwhelmed and I don’t have anyone in real life to talk to about this

because my family doesn’t understand my relationship with my husband and don’t support us. Reddit, WIBTA if I held my ground?

What started as a compassionate move to help during hardship quickly morphed into boundary-testing territory, from rearranging furniture to critiquing kid snacks and weighing in on marital roles.

The core tension boils down to divided loyalties. The husband vented to his mom about a domestic disagreement, and she stepped in with strong words about what makes a “good” wife.

This left the pregnant wife feeling undermined in her own home, especially while navigating exhaustion from pregnancy and full-time parenting. It’s easy to see why she snapped, built-up frustrations from multiple directions hit a breaking point.

Experts highlight how multigenerational living can strain relationships if boundaries aren’t clear from the start. According to Pew Research Center data, about 18% of the U.S. population lived in multigenerational households in 2021, a share that has more than doubled since 1971, often driven by economic needs or family support.

While these setups offer benefits like shared childcare or financial relief, they can blur lines between generations, leading to interference in couple decisions.

Couples therapist Quinelle Hickman emphasizes the need for honesty and clarity: “Setting boundaries will become increasingly important when you’re living with parents-in-law. Remember, boundaries can be clear and loving and they exist to maintain harmony within your household.”

This rings true here. The MIL’s involvement in private matters like lunch-packing expectations shows how unchecked input can erode the couple’s autonomy.

Neutral ground lies in open communication as a united couple. The husband could reaffirm his partnership by addressing issues directly rather than outsourcing complaints, while the wife might express appreciation for the help extended to his mom alongside her need for space.

Solutions could include temporary arrangements for the MIL, clear house rules everyone agrees on, or even professional mediation if tensions persist. Ultimately, prioritizing the nuclear family unit helps everyone thrive long-term.

See what others had to share with OP:

Some people strongly support the OP as NTA and emphasize that the husband must prioritize his wife and nuclear family over his mother.

gooberfaced − NTA You and husband need to have a discussion so that both of you are on the same page on things.

With his mother in the house he HAS to be 100% with you on anything that involves your team.

He sounds as if he is going to run to mommy with everything and this must be stopped or her living there is going to ruin your marriage.

The two of you and your children are the family unit here and you and your husband are the TEAM in charge of things.

MIL is an additional player- not running the house and not making demands.

She lives there because of the team's generosity and anything she does to disrupt that TEAM is unacceptable.

But until you get your husband to feel the same way there is going to be friction.

This is not about packing lunches. This is about your husband taking sides and being influenced by his mom.

Apparently, he complained to his mother about it, because she confronted me last night about being a bad wife.

Husband 100% in the wrong here and it needs to stop. This is your problem.

Husband needs to understand what TEAM he plays for and not be complaining to his mommy OR allowing her to speak to his wife this way.

And clearly, you guys need to start making other arrangements for mommy- this is very likely only going to get worse.

SlothLordMcMarekat − NTA Sounds like MIL needs to get out of your house.

Whatever’s happened to change her circumstances isn’t your problem, and her redirecting that frustration to managing your household isn’t ok.

And your husband should be backing you on this

Some people criticize the husband for acting like a “momma’s boy” and running to his mother instead of handling issues with his wife.

Gypsy-Nyx − NTA. he complained to his mother about it, So he has become a momma's boy?

Something that goes wrong that he doesn't like he is running a mama.

If you were making everyone's lunches the night before and they just had to pull them out of the refrigerator then I would say go ahead and do it.

but trying to force you, while you're pregnant with his third child, forcing you up earlier

just to make his lunch cuz he's too bunch of a baby to make his own lunch?!? Hell to the no.

If he wants to be such a mama's boy his mother can make his lunch... Or better yet she can get out of your house... Does he have any other...

hellyeahletsgo2344 − YWNBTA. Why is this grown ass man insisting you make his lunch for him?

Seems like having his mother around has resorted to him acting like a child and she’s enabling that.

Some people suggest letting the MIL pack the husband’s lunch since she is so involved and concerned about it.

Dittoheadforever − "Now my husband expects me to give my MIL an apology and start packing his lunch, and neither of them are talking to me until then."

So your husband recruited his mommy to his side over a minor disagreement,

which piled onto a build up of a lot of tension his controlling mommy is causing in your home.

You reached a breaking point and finally snapped. Now they're punishing you with the silent treatment.

You're absolutely NTA. Enjoy the silence as much as you can.

ETA: let his mommy make his lunch if she's so concerned about him and so intent on disrupting and controlling things in your home

browniiis200 − NTA- Since it's so important to his mother, she can pack his lunch everyday. Problem solved!

Some people point out the husband’s immaturity and laziness, especially given the OP is pregnant.

ABCBDMomma − NTA. He’s 35, definitely old enough to make his own lunch.

If you decide to make it, give him a kids meal - peanut butter sandwich, a cheese stick, and one cookie.

If he’s going to act like a little kid, he can eat like one. As for MIL, she needs to be reminded that she’s a guest in your home not...

[Reddit User] − You are literally growing a human inside of you and he wants to take away your sleep. That level of laziness is so unappealing. NTA

Some people urge the OP to stop catering to the husband and MIL, stand firm, and consider getting the MIL out of the house soon.

morgaina − NTA It sounds like you need to get the MIL out of your apartment asap.

She's inserting herself into your business, disrupting your marriage, and making your husband even more selfish and inconsiderate than he was before.

TheGrimReader1888 − NTA. Sounds like there is a reason your family doesn't like your husband.

It also sounds like YOU are doing all the sacrificing and compromising in this relationship from what I can read.

Don't pack his lunch, stop catering to his mother, and tell them both that they are welcome to leave if they aren't happy with it.

You already have two children and another on the way, you don't need two more at home giving you headaches over petty issues.

This tale shows how quickly good intentions can complicate home life when boundaries blur and old patterns resurface. Do you think the wife should hold firm on not packing the lunch, especially given her pregnancy and the added household stress, or offer a small compromise to ease tensions? How would you handle a similar in-law dynamic while keeping your marriage strong? Drop your thoughts below!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 30/31 votes | 97%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/31 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/31 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 1/31 votes | 3%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/31 votes | 0%

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone is a valuable freelance writer at DAILY HIGHLIGHT. As a senior entertainment and news writer, Jeffrey brings a wealth of expertise in the field, specifically focusing on the entertainment industry.

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