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Is It Anxiety or Instinct? A Mother’s Escape Wins Online Support

by Carolyn Mullet
December 21, 2025
in Social Issues

We often talk about a mother’s intuition as a superpower. It is that quiet, nagging voice that whispers when something just does not feel right. Sometimes we brush it off as anxiety or an overactive imagination. Other times, listening to that voice becomes the most important decision we ever make.

A brave woman recently shared a story that feels like a tense thriller movie, yet it was her reality. After a series of bizarre “accidents” involving allergies and stairs, a bowl of soup became the tipping point. Her partner tried to blame her daughter for a missing wallet, but this mom decided to trust her child and her gut.

It is a story about safety, trust, and the courage to leave when the red flags turn into alarms.

The Story:

Is It Anxiety or Instinct? A Mother’s Escape Wins Online Support
Not the actual photo

AITAH for believing my daughter over a “grown man”?

I don’t know if i watch too many crime shows or if I’m just paranoid so I’ve come here to ask. Last week I made chicken gnocchi soup.

When it was almost done I started helping my daughter with a school project. She got us both a bowl and a few seconds later

my bf runs into the room with a bowl and tells me to eat the bowl he has. I told him it was all the same

and he insisted that he wanted mine because it had more chicken. Thinking back now I don’t know how he would know that

considering my daughter dished it out. My daughter took the bowl he gave me and said she would eat it. He yanked it out of hand

and said “no it’s for mom”. I took the bowl and he went to the living room. I continued doing my daughter's project

and told her not to eat the soup. 20ish minutes later I walked into the kitchen to pour the soups out and he was still

eating his. He asked why we didn’t eat any and I said the cat got into it while we were waiting for it to

cool down. He screamed “WHAT!? Was it your bowl !?! Cats can’t eat that!?”. I told him it was only a lick but he has

been stressed out watching the cat like a hawk, obsessive even. His reaction was very weird. These "accidents" all happened before the soup incident

over the span of 6 months. It wasn't one after another in a short period of time. Since then my emergency money has gone

missing. I keep money hidden just in case. I lost my older sister because she wasn’t able to escape a dangerous situation and I

literally swore on her grave I would never be in that position. After the soup incident I went to get my money and

it was gone. It was hidden and I changed the location every few months. I asked my daughter if maybe she found it

and that if she took it I wouldn’t be mad because I knew she couldn’t have spent it. She said no. A few

hours later she tells me she forgot but the other day her and my bf got pulled over and she saw my pink wallet

in his glove box. I did not tell her which wallet it was in or that it was in a wallet. I decided

to ask him if he found it by accident. He asked me why I was hiding a large amount of money, “you know you

could never leave me” and laughed. (He has never said anything like that before). I told him it was for my daughters Christmas.

He said no he didn’t find the money but could use his credit card for gifts. I didn’t tell him about my daughter

seeing my wallet in his car. Now here are a few other things that have happened in the past few months that seemed

random at the time but now they don’t. I have a severe allergy to latex. One day we were about to have s__

and I glanced at the mirror we have by our bed and saw the condom wrapper was a different color. I stopped him because

it wasn’t latex free and he said it was a mistake and just an older one he had. We have been dating

for over 2 years and he knows how serious my allergy is. My epipen that I keep in my room is missing and

I didn’t realize it. I didn't realize it was missing until I was searching for my money. Another odd thing is one day

he was following me down the stairs while I was carrying laundry and he kicked the back of my leg and I fell.

He said he slipped but the stairs are wood and he was wearing his steel toe boots. At the time I thought

it was an accident. Am I overthinking this? My anxiety has been at an all time high. Do I watch too much true crime?

Here is why I think I might be the a__hole. We have a good relationship. He loves my daughter like she is

his. We split all shared bills and we both pull our own weight around the apartment. We don’t fight. He has

never so much as raised his voice at me. We are paycheck to paycheck but bills are paid. I thought about

going to my moms house for a few days and asking him when I get there when I’m safe about the money

but I don’t have money to do that now. She is on a fixed income and can't help. I feel stupid for

being scared. Last night I decided to check his car for my wallet and he caught me. I asked him for

my money back and he tried playing dumb. I told him my daughter saw it there. He told me she was lying.

I told him I never told her about the money or what wallet. He said he was a grown man and

kids lie all the time. I asked him once more for my money and he said “I’m not giving you money to

leave me”. I waited until he was in the shower to grab my cat and my daughter and we left. I can’t

take my cat with us to a shelter and the DV shelters are full. I was able to get us a night at

a cheap motel. This exact situation is why I had money saved. I did everything right and now I’m screwed. I feel

like I just blew up my entire life.. Yes I'm using a burner account and reading all the comments that I can.

My heart started racing just reading the first few sentences of this story. It is truly terrifying how small, seemingly random events can slowly paint a picture of danger. We often want to believe the best in the people we love. We want to believe that a trip on the stairs is just clumsy feet or that a switched bowl is just a quirk.

However, the moment he admitted to holding onto her money to prevent her from leaving is where the air leaves the room. It validates every single fear she had. It is such a relief to know she prioritized her safety and her daughter’s word over staying polite. It takes immense bravery to pack up and go, especially when resources are tight.

Expert Opinion

Trusting your instincts is one of the most vital survival tools we possess. Security expert Gavin de Becker calls this “The Gift of Fear.” He suggests that fear is not always just an emotion but a lightning-fast data processing signal from our brain telling us safety is compromised.

In this story, the boyfriend’s behavior aligns with patterns of “coercive control.” This is a form of psychological abuse where a partner systematically erodes a person’s autonomy. A study published in Journal of Family Violence notes that financial abuse, such as hiding money to prevent a partner from leaving, is present in 99% of domestic violence cases.

Dr. Judith Orloff, a psychiatrist and author, emphasizes the importance of listening to the body. She notes that if you feel drained, anxious, or “on edge” around a partner, it is your body reacting to subtle cues of danger. The missing Epipen and the stair incident are physical manifestations of this danger.

Furthermore, gaslighting plays a huge role here. By telling the OP that she is “paranoid” or that her daughter is a liar, the partner attempts to rewrite reality. This makes the victim question their own sanity. Recognizing these signs early, as this mother did, is the key to breaking free before escalation occurs.

Community Opinions

The online community rallied around this mother with an intense wave of validation and urgency. Readers were quick to point out that these were likely not accidents at all.

The majority of comments focused on immediate safety, validating that her fears were real.

ok0905 − I'm 100% sure he has been trying to k__l you. A 100%

Winter-eyed − Once is an anomaly, twice is a coincidence, three times is a pattern. Document EVERYTHING. Get your money and your papers

and valuables to someone you trust and get yourself and your daughter out safely. You are not being paranoid and you need to trust your instincts.

Divinised-Void − NTA and oh god run away. I mean, the red flags are so obvious here

it almost seems made up, like a telenovela script. If this is real, run away from that murderer you live with.

Commenters noticed the specific tactic of controlling her money to keep her trapped.

Special_Lychee_6847 − NTA The fact alone that he says things like 'I'm not giving you money to you can leave me'

and 'you'll never be able to leave me' is enough to not feel safe with him. Not feeling safe is like the biggest reason to leave someone.

mrsgip − NTA but file a police report. He stole your money. It may just be your word against his but a written trail of his mess will help you...

Pleasant-Koala147 − You’re not paranoid. He’s trying to hurt you. How much money did he take?

If he’s offered his credit card for you to go shopping, go straight to an ATM and take the money you lost out of his card. Use that to get...

Others pointed out that these “accidents” seemed to be getting more dangerous over time.

GloInTheDarkUnicorn − I would not be at all surprised if he took out a life insurance policy on you.

a-very-tired-witch − N. T. A. You were smart to trust your gut and run, safe men are not concerned whether you have money to leave them...

He is actively and flippantly risking your life... and showing a considerable lack of concern for your own wellbeing.

Practical Help for Pets

Some kind users offered specific advice on how to handle the family cat during the escape.

SkittlesKittenz − Can you call local vets? Many veterinary clinics support the purple leash project...

I hope your situation improves and you can get to friends/family/somewhere safe.

How to Navigate a Situation Like This

If you ever feel unsafe in your relationship or notice a pattern of dangerous “accidents,” please listen to that inner alarm. Your safety is more important than being polite or “wrong.”

First, try to secure your important documents and a small stash of funds in a place your partner cannot access, perhaps with a trusted friend. If you suspect your physical safety is at risk, do not announce you are leaving. It is often safer to leave quietly when the partner is away, just as the OP did.

Reach out to local resources immediately. Organizations like the National Domestic Violence Hotline (The Hotline) can help you create a personalized safety plan. Remember that you do not need “proof” of abuse to deserve safety. Your feeling of fear is valid enough.

Conclusion

This story is a chilling reminder that we must always advocate for our own safety. The OP’s decision to trust her daughter and her instincts likely saved them from a worsening situation. It is a powerful testament to a mother’s protective spirit.

Have you ever had a gut feeling about a situation that turned out to be right? How do you distinguish between anxiety and true intuition? We hope this story encourages everyone to take their feelings seriously.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

Carolyn Mullet

Carolyn Mullet

Carolyn Mullet is in charge of planning and content process management, business development, social media, strategic partnership relations, brand building, and PR for DailyHighlight. Before joining Dailyhighlight, she served as the Vice President of Editorial Development at Aubtu Today, and as a senior editor at various magazines and media agencies.

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