Sister Who Forgave Dad’s Affair Begs For Mom’s Comfort When Her Own Fiancé Betrays Her

A family cracked apart long ago when the father cheated on his wife during her grueling medical school years, leaving one daughter scarred and furious while the younger one shrugged it off as ancient history.

The little girl bonded tightly with the new stepmother, even pressuring everyone to forgive and blend the families, once issuing a harsh ultimatum that kept her own mom away from graduation. Years of distance followed. Now grown, the younger sister’s world collapses after discovering her fiancé’s infidelity, and she reaches desperately for the mother she once pushed aside. A cool, distant response arrives instead, stirring fresh accusations across the divided family.

Sister overlooking dad’s affair, says “cheating happens”, now faces the same problem.

In this Redditor’s situation, the core issue revolves around empathy and boundaries. The older sister sided with their mom, carrying the weight of knowing the full truth about the dad’s affair from a young age.

Meanwhile, the younger one minimized the pain, even pressuring their mom to forgive and include the stepmom, leading to years of strained relations.

Fast-forward to now: the younger sister’s fiancé cheats, leaving her devastated and craving support. But expecting full-throated sympathy from a mom she’s distanced through tough choices highlights a mismatch in emotional reciprocity.

From one perspective, the younger sister’s actions stemmed from her age during the original events; she was young, influenced by the adults around her, and genuinely believed “cheating happens” and families could blend happily.

Her campaign for forgiveness might have come from a place of wanting harmony, not malice. Yet dismissing a parent’s deep hurt and issuing ultimatums can erode trust over time, making it hard for the betrayed to rally when roles reverse.

This ties into broader family dynamics around infidelity. Parental betrayal often leaves lasting marks on kids, shaping how they view trust and relationships.

Clinical psychologist Ana Nogales, in her work on the subject, notes that growing up in a family with infidelity has a lasting impact on children in terms of how they view their romantic relationships and their ability to trust future partners.

Her research shows sobering numbers: 80% of affected children say the infidelity shapes their outlook on romance and relationships, while 70% report it affects their general trust in others.

These effects can create ripple effects across generations, like heightened sensitivity to betrayal or difficulty offering unconditional support in conflicted families.

Neutral advice? Open, honest conversations, perhaps with a therapist’s help can bridge gaps. Acknowledge past pains without score-keeping, set clear boundaries, and focus on individual healing. Families don’t have to force closeness, but mutual respect goes a long way.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Some people view the sister’s hypocrisy as karma and suggest throwing her past words back at her.

Some people declare OP and mom not the asshole while criticizing the sister’s double standards on forgiveness.

Some people highlight family bias and advise sticking with the mom against biased relatives.

This story wraps up with a poignant reminder: actions (or inactions) in family crises can echo for years, influencing how support flows when life gets tough. The Redditor’s blunt honesty to her sister might sting, but it stems from protecting a mom who’s endured a lot.

Was it fair to highlight the past hypocrisy, or could a softer approach have opened doors? And how do you balance loyalty to one family member without alienating another? Tough questions with no easy answers. Drop your thoughts below, what would you do in this tangled family web?