Woman Wants To Be A Stay-At-Home Wife With No Kids After Engagement—Her Fiancé Calls Her Lazy

After three years of dating and a recent engagement, this man was ready to build a future with the woman he loved. But while planning their wedding, she dropped a bombshell: she wanted to quit her job and become a stay-at-home wife. No kids. No business plan. Just the desire to stop working altogether.

Caught off guard and concerned about finances, the man responded with a comment he now regrets—calling her “lazy.” It sparked a fight. She left for her mother’s house. And now, he’s asking Reddit: AITA for not wanting to be the only one working—and for calling her out?

One man’s vision of an equal partnership clashed with his fiancée’s dream of a stay-at-home life, turning wedding plans into a battleground

Talk about a wedding vow that nearly broke before it was made! This Redditor’s heated clash with his fiancée over her stay-at-home wife dream—child-free and without a clear plan—has their engagement teetering. Calling her “lazy” was a low blow, but is he wrong to reject funding her lifestyle shift, or is she dodging accountability?

Relationship goals need alignment, not ultimatums. Nathan Astle, a renowned Psychology of Debt, states in a 2025 Psychology Today article, “Establishing financial structures that reflect shared values can help couples avoid conflict”. The Redditor values a dual-income partnership, while his fiancée’s sudden desire to quit, without detailing her contributions, feels like a bait-and-switch post-proposal. Her calling him “manipulative” for suggesting a stay-at-home role only with kids hints at defensiveness, not dialogue.

Financial dynamics add fuel. A 2023 Pew Research study found 60% of couples prefer dual incomes for financial stability, especially without children. The Redditor’s higher earnings don’t obligate him to support a lifestyle downgrade, especially if she offers no household trade-off, like managing chores. Her timing—post-engagement—suggests she may have hidden this dream, eroding trust.

Could they have handled it better? The Redditor’s “lazy” jab escalated things, but her vague “dream” left him grasping for clarity. A calm discussion about her burnout or aspirations might’ve bridged the gap. Neutral advice? They should explore compromises, like part-time work or a trial period, and seek couples counseling to align their visions. If no middle ground exists, parting ways may be kinder than resentment. What do you think—fair stance or harsh words?

Reddit’s relationship gurus didn’t mince words, mostly backing the Redditor while questioning his fiancée’s motives

Claw_- accused the fiancée of waiting until the proposal to reveal her “lazy” dream.

Skuldintape_eire mocked her “dream” of doing nothing, supporting the Redditor’s stance.
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This Reddit user found it odd the topic never arose in three years of dating.

Another user labeled them incompatible, saying neither is wrong but they shouldn’t marry.

A Reddit user flagged her “manipulative” claim as a red flag for unequal partnership.

This user warned a single income risks financial ruin if the Redditor can’t work.

One asked who handles chores, suggesting her request might balance household duties.

Redditor argued a stay-at-home wife without kids isn’t a job, unlike parenting.

This commenter questioned what she’d contribute, flipping the scenario to test fairness.

One suggested her burnout might explain the request, urging compromise.

This Redditor’s dream of an equal partnership hit a snag when his fiancée’s housewife ambition sparked a fiery “lazy” jab. Her bolt to her mom’s and vague plans left him questioning their future. Was he too harsh, or is her dream a one-sided deal? Can they salvage their love, or is this engagement doomed? How would you handle a partner’s surprise lifestyle switch? Toss your thoughts into the wedding ring below!